Control (Dark Romance)

Chapter 48

Wrote this chapter to Cardigan by Taylor Swift, here's a version where it's raining!

Either way I recommend listening o the song while reading!

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Zyair's POV

...Hagen...

I call his name, but it's muffled in the fog of his mind.

Hagen!

I try again, barging against the mental wall that had started to mount between us ever since Nikola had left. I hadn't abandoned him— I never could— but I hadn't realised it'd climbed so high either.

Hagen! HAGEN STOP!

Hagen jerks so hard the wash-cloth drops from his hand, falling onto the smooth shower tiles and splashing his foot with water that makes him jerk again. He stumbles back, hands grasping at the wall as he finally breaks from his trance.

Zyair? — he calls with fear as he mentally seeks me out.

I don't shy away from his reach; I don't dare. I take a firm grasp of him within our mind and soul, holding on so that there's no chance of him slipping from me again.

I'm here. I'm right here, Hagen — I vow as I carefully press against his consciousness — Give me control.

Hagen's gaze drops, settling over his inflamed arms that only grow darker with the water beating down on him — I... when did I...

Give me control — I repeat, pressing a little harder now — I'll handle it.

Hagen wavers, stuck between the order I'm giving him and the scene he doesn't remember putting himself in, but fear makes him withdraw, and I immediately seize the opportunity to take control.

At the forefront, everything is far too much— the hot water spraying down, the steam stifling the bathroom, and the raw ache over our skin, and it's no wonder that Hagen hadn't even realised what he was doing.

Zyair... — his confused whimper forms cracks in my heart ferociously from guilt.

I'd been negligent in my anger with Hagen. Present, but never fully, close but far, and supportive but still angry.

I couldn't help it, not after what he'd done and how long he'd taken to spur into action, but Hagen was still my counterpart and I was supposed to see him through it all. Through every step of the way, even the ones that felt like walking over broken shards.

I'll handle it — I promise as I take off the shower's water and step out.

I dry us quickly, ignoring the aches over my skin as I step outside. The room is far cooler, and the rush of the rain-kissed air makes breathing no longer such a challenge. But even with the fresh air, exhaustion etches itself throughout my muscles, and hunger caves in my stomach.

Rest is what we need, and a lot of it if we were to face whatever was waiting for us tomorrow, but I couldn't be there for Hagen until I knew that I still had Neo.

"I will always want you, Zyair,"

Goddess, I hoped he still did.

We'd made promises, but that had been months ago— before things had worsened beyond either of our estimations. Promises were lovely when they lasted, but how strong could they be when we hardly knew anything about each other outside of our incomprehensible love for one another?

Are you sure about this? - Hagen asks tentatively while I dig through the bedroom's wardrobe. I grab the first shirt I find, tugging it over my head even while it scratches at my raw skin. He might not be very... receptive.