Control (Dark Romance)

Chapter 49

Nikola's POV

I made a mistake last night. Bringing him into the castle had been a mistake.

In actuality, the error started long before last night. It began in all the times I'd let myself pass by the windows, involuntarily checking if he was still there when any sort of notice of our mangled bond would've told me so without me being so close.

I should've stayed further away because what was out of sight would have likely been kept out of mind.
If I'd done so, I would've never seen him face the guards' resistance, I would have never gone down there, and he would not be here, within the castle.

But it was too late to truly rectify the situation now. What was done was done, and for how much I regretted it, I was happy that it had spawned a chance for Neo and Zyair to reaffirm their devotion to one another.

I had told Neo that he could have his mate, and I'd meant it. What the pair did in their private time was of no concern to me, once all evidence of it was wiped from our bond when I took control again. To my pleasure, it had been.

You did not actually believe that I would do that to you? — Neo pipes up, sounding slightly hurt despite the overall joy that had been spurring from him since he'd seen Zyair.

I wanted to loathe it, but I could not find enough animosity to do so because even if it was not mine, it was a lovely feeling. All that joy, all that love... at least one of us deserved to enjoy such pleasures.

No — I reply — Of course not, but I know how hard it can be to resist those urges.

Neo huffs his agreement though his scent still sours slightly from the reminder.

It was not easy to strip yourself of your mate's scent along with any proof of them on your body, especially after all the distance they'd spent apart, but Neo had done it for me. More than that, he'd done the same with Hagen's body, with Zyair's shared understanding.

I appreciated that; more than that, I adored him for it. But I wasn't stupid.

That sort of strength would not last very long. There was a reason why we were paired— he was no better than me when it came to the strength of his desires and wants, or thwarting them for that matter, and with Zyair so willing, it would only be a matter of time before he could not resist but to let the proof of their love linger.

I did not know how I would cope then. I was sure we would agree on terms, as we'd already done, but what I did know, was that I would need Hagen gone by the time that came.

I could not bear to have his scent paraded around me...and mine on him, and having him close. I could not.

The only option was to fast-forward the plot of my original plan.

I could never hurt Hagen— I'd quicker cut myself down at the ankles than do so— but time spent within the castle would do it for me. With the abundance of love he'd grown up with, Hagen was too supple to do without kindness and affection for long periods of time. The cold contrast of life within the castle would drive him out.

I simply had to endure until that happened.

I remind myself of this as Knots peers up at me, watching closely while I finish lacing up my boots. I slide a palm under his head, petting him with a crooked smile until he's purring a hiss and draping himself over my lap.

My eyes rove over his scales, checking that each is rich with health all the way down to where his tail curls against the tips of my shoes. My gaze settles there.

The boots were dry now, but I could still picture their shine from last night's rainfall. It'd been the point I'd settled my mind on to centre myself while Hagen had followed after me, trying to draw himself closer with each step... so desperate to be close.