miss coffee - chaesoo

18

Jisoo invited herself into Roseanne's room.

A breach in their barrier, she supposed. But what Sooyoung had told her was weighing her down, forcing her to stay awake all night with these haunted thoughts that she just couldn't help herself.

It was empty, only a bed and a desk placed in different corners. Her walks were white, her window cracked open to let in the gentle breeze.

There wasn't any lingering scent of the blonde. Her sheets were mallow— everything was plain. Her books were all neatly placed on her desk, a picture frame resting face down above it.

Jisoo walked over, carefully reaching towards it and turning it over. It was slightly cracked, a crumpled photo displayed in it. It showed a little boy with a wide smile and dusty blonde hair Jisoo could recognise anywhere.

His pale skin was familiar, he shared the same blemish above his lip as Roseanne and his ears stuck out much like his mother's. His sense of style, and sense of self, was all too familiar.

That was, no doubt, Roseanne's son.

"What are you doing in here?" Jisoo was startled, almost dropping the picture frame on the desk. She turned to see an angry Roseanne, storming up to her to grab the frame off the brunette roughly.

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to talk."

"Snooping is not talking." Roseanne moved towards her bed, lifting up her pillow and putting the frame under it. Turning to face Jisoo, her expression suggested one of frustration, her look clearly stating for Jisoo to hurry up and spit out what she wanted to say.

"Rosie... I want to choose you, I do."

Roseanne felt her heart shatter a little. Not because she was disappointed that Jisoo was choosing her over the father of her own child, but because of the way Jisoo was fidgeting, she knew there would be a 'but' at the end of the sentence.

Jisoo's hand hovered over her stomach. "But with this baby, Bohyun is offering me so much more in the long run. He's the father of my child and it doesn't matter if I love him or not, I can't be selfish and I can't hurt you anymore."

Roseanne felt something sincere in Jisoo's words and when her glossy eyes met the brunette's, she could see just how hard it was for her to fathom whatever she needed to say to the blonde.

"Jisoo, I want to be with you. More than anything."

"And I don't want you to give anything up for me." Her lips started to quiver, her own heart shattering knowing what she was doing. "I don't want you to have to throw away this life too."

Roseanne's eyes glanced at the picture frame. Jisoo was hinting at something she had left in the past, and Roseanne's tough exterior was breaking down.

"I think it's better we forget anything ever happened and stay as friends. It's better for us, our friends, and the people we love."

Neither woman truly wanted that.

They wanted each other.

But for the lives they wanted, where they strived to be in a few years didn't involve either of them. Jisoo wanted her kid to have a happy life, with their father. And Roseanne wanted to settle down to focus on herself without anyone.

They were much too different from each other and longed for things they couldn't have. It was time to stop being selfish and lying to fool around.

Roseanne swallowed that lump in her throat— the one that urged her to grab Jisoo by the face and kiss her slowly, whispering to her how much she wanted her to stay and how they should just forget everyone and live their lives together.

Instead, Roseanne uttered,

"Okay."

Jisoo was sitting at her vanity, rehearsing what she was going to say as she waited for her boyfriend's face to return to the screen.

They had Facetimed and Bohyun assured that no one would bother him so late into the night. Well, everyone except his bladder who urged him to use the bathroom before Jisoo even had a chance to really see her fiancé's handsome face.

If Bohyun and Jisoo both decided to keep this baby, there were things Jisoo needed to discuss that bothered her. Such as, if delaying the wedding would be the best option, putting the money away for a house, selling her business to afford the extra luggage she was currently carrying.

Bohyun earned enough for them to be comfortable with a single child, but if Jisoo wanted to stay at home and be with the baby, the cost of running her small business would exceed their limit...

Her mind was running in circles, planning for a future she hadn't agreed on yet. She wanted this baby, she had always wanted a baby. But there was so much to account for and, for Jisoo, it happened without the planning— practically, in the worst way possible.

"Hey, I'm back," Said Bohyun as he made himself comfortable on the hotel bed. "So, what is it you want to tell me?"

Jisoo felt the pace of her heart suddenly quicken, and the words she had been planning to say didn't fall out the way she had wanted— they didn't fall out at all.  Every time she opened her mouth, she could only stutter and stay quiet.

Bohyun was patient, watching as Jisoo tried and tried until she eventually became frustrated and tears poured out from her eyes. He started to grow irrationally worried.

"I'm pregnant!" She, finally, coherently yelled out amidst all her sobbing.

Bohyun's eyes widened.

"Oh, god," Jisoo said, wiping away the tears from her eyes. "I'm pregnant and I'm so scared and I just want you to come home and we can't even do this right now, we are supposed to get married!" Jisoo's eyes finally dared to fall on her fiancé's reaction. "I don't want you to leave me if you end up not wanting a baby. I can—"

She stopped when a gentle giggle fell off the man's lips. She sniffled, watching his eyes light up with joy and his smile grow creepily wider.

"Jisoo... how could I get mad at you?" He asked, watching as the brunette fumbled around to wipe her face. "This is awesome news— only if you want it— you know, your body your choice."

Jisoo nodded. "I do want it. But I don't want to do this by myself."

"And you won't," He assured. "I promise you, I will be there every step of the way. When I get home, we can have a nice baby shower and invite your family and friends and it can be a super sweet thing to get you going. Does that sound nice?"

Jisoo smiled a little. "It does."

Bohyun reciprocated her soft tone of voice. "Okay. I'll be home in two days, just hold on till then, Soo. I love you, we can do this."

Jisoo nodded, feeling more confident than she did.

"I love you too."

next chapter gonna be a lil jenlisa jump js so there isn't such a short jump between this main bit