All the Young Dudes ( Sirius' Perspective )

Seventh Year : Back to School

Sirius woke with his back aching, muscles stiff and sore from sleeping propped against a wall. His neck cracked when he stretched, and he smacked his lips a few times—his mouth was incredibly dry, and tasted disgusting. He thought longingly of his toothbrush, sitting on the little bedside table at the Leaky Cauldron.

The door cracked open just as he was standing, and Grant walked in. He stopped when he saw Sirius, blinking.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Remus said, following behind him. He shut the door and slipped past Grant, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder as he did so—a small, familiar gesture.

“Just got up,” Sirius replied, “How long’ve you lot been awake?”

“Not long,” Remus shrugged. He’d walked over to Sirius, hand slightly outstretched, but now stood awkwardly in front of him, as if he’d just remembered that Grant was there, too. He glanced back at the other boy, who was very pointedly looking at the floor.

Remus cleared his throat. “Just went to the loo. It’s outside, if you need to…?”

“Nah,” Sirius shook his head. An awkward silence followed; Remus glanced anxiously between him and Grant.

“Er…I know you sort of met last night, but Grant, this is Sirius…”

The skinny boy looked up, finally, starting forward with an embarrassed smile and his hands shoved into his pockets.

“Yeah, ‘course,” he hovered a few feet away, “Sorry ‘bout how I acted. Caught me on a bad night.” He let out a strained, sheepish sort of laugh.

“Oh. Don’t worry about it,” Sirius said, politely. After a moment, he added, “Nice to meet you.”

Grant smiled and nodded, looking away. Sirius got the distinct feeling that the other boy would have preferred it if he weren’t there at all; he seemed just as uncomfortable with Sirius as Sirius felt around him.

“I was just going to take Grant down to the station, see him off to Brighton.” Remus said, clearly sensing the tension. Sirius nodded.

“Alright. I’ll come with you.”

Remus studied him for a moment, but didn’t argue. They waited while Grant packed his few belongings into the rucksack, and within ten minutes they were ready to set off.

Muggle London was just as fascinating in the morning as it was at night, though the people were considerably different – no more crazily dressed teenagers. Instead, they passed by men in suits and ties that walked briskly, glancing at their watches; mothers strolling hand in hand with young children; schoolkids in uniform, chattering and swinging their bookbags. Sirius tried not to stare too obviously, walking a few steps behind Remus and Grant.

It was…disconcerting, watching the two of them together. Sirius had always thought of Remus as someone closed-off, distant, private. Even with his friends, there were always layers, secrets to unpick, walls to sneak past. The mystery was something that had always drawn him to Moony; Remus was like a never-ending puzzle, and it gave Sirius a thrill of joy to be one of the only people allowed to solve it.

But with Grant, he felt different. It was like there were no barriers between them when they talked—like there had never been any barriers, at all. Sirius only had to listen to their easy banter to see how well they understood each other. It made his heart twist, looking at the skinny blond muggle and knowing that he understood Remus—that he knew him—in a way that Sirius never would.