All the Young Dudes ( Sirius' Perspective )

Seventh Year : What We Lack

Wednesday 29th March 1978

Quidditch practice that weekend was dire. Marlene showed up, same as usual, and ran through all the drills with her typical dedicated concentration. But she didn’t say a word to James or Sirius—she hardly even spoke to Yaz, who shrugged apologetically at the two of them once practice was over and hurried off to the locker rooms after her girlfriend. The drills went fairly well, but Sirius could tell that James was worried—how were they supposed to come together as a team and win the Quidditch Cup if the two beaters wouldn’t so much as look in each other’s direction?

Still, he didn’t say anything, wisely electing to give Marlene space. Sirius, on the other hand, didn’t try to hide his anger, slamming his locker door and grumbling as they changed out of their quidditch kits.

“She’s a bloody bigot, is what she is,” he muttered darkly, drying his hair from the shower, “We’re better off without her, if that’s the way she’s going to act.”

James shot him a look. “Come on, Pads. I’m just as upset as you are, but she’s going through a really difficult time; she’s not a bad person.”

“We’re all going through a difficult bloody time!” Sirius frowned, yanking his shirt on, “It’s not as if she’s the only one whose family’s been affected by the war!”

“No, but she’s the only one of us whose brother got attacked by a werewolf.”

“And my brother’s a bloody death-eater!” Sirius snapped, “Boo-hoo! Sometimes shit happens, doesn’t mean she gets to take it out on Remus.”

James blinked. “Padfoot…” he said, carefully, “I get what you’re saying, I do. But…things with Regulus…well, that’s just not the same as what Marlene’s got going on.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

James ran a hand through his hair, exasperated. “Marlene’s brother didn’t choose to become a werewolf, Sirius. Someone else forced it on him.”

Sirius faltered, fumbling with the buttons.

The only real difference between you and me, Sirius, is that you got a choice.

After a moment, he shook his head.

“I’m not—” he finished buttoning his shirt, frowning, “I’m not trying to say it’s the same. I’m just saying that…whatever she’s going through, it’s not an excuse for making Remus feel like shit.”

“I know,” James said, quietly, “It’s not an excuse, just—an explanation. It’s not like she’s intending to be cruel.”

Sirius snorted. “Does that matter?”

“I think it does.”

They were quiet, for a bit, pulling on robes and storing their brooms. As they headed back towards the castle, Sirius found himself asking,

“…why?”

“Hmm?”

“Why do you think it matters?” He clarified, “Whether Marlene intends it or not. She’s still saying all the same things as the people who do mean it to be cruel, and if anything it hurts him more, because she’s supposed to be his friend.”