Ruthless ; B•E

Twenty one

"She won't eat or even fucking talk to me Natasha. I don't know what else to do." Billie covered her face with her hands and let out a deep sigh.
"I can try to talk to her Billie. But if that don't work we'll have to check her in." Natasha got up and made her way up to the bedroom where Aliza laid lifelessly in bed.
"Hey kiddo I heard what happened. Care to tell me about it?" Tasha sat in the edge of the bed with her back turned to Aliza to give her comfort and space.
Aliza stayed quiet, not even breathing as heavy as she was a moment ago.
A single tear traveled across the bridge of her nose and down her cheek.
"Billie feels so much regret for not being there for you Aliza. She cares about you, I promise she does. We all do, but we can't help you if you don't tell us how to."
Aliza kept her back facing the elder woman but she cleared her throat, indicating that she wanted to speak but didn't know exactly what to say.
"If I make you sushi will you talk?" Natasha turned to Aliza but still. No response.
"When will the nightmares go away? I'm always alone every night." Aliza blurted out in such a tiresome voice.
"I know what he did was so fucking cruel kiddo. I know, it'll all go away soon I promise it will."
"Can Billie come up?" Aliza discreetly wiped her tears with the corner of the soft white blanket.
"Of course."
Once Natasha walked out of the bedroom Aliza took the time to steady out her breathing.
God was it so hard to even think clearly without bawling.
"Hey love. I heard you're speaking now." Billie calmly said while sitting on the bed closer to Aliza.
"Can you cancel tonight please? I want to talk." Aliza forced her words out and Billie felt so happy and relieved to hear her voice.
"Yeah.. yeah I'll cancel. Is there anything specific you'd want for dinner?" Billie's voice was so calm. It was unusual for her to be so subtle.
"No." Aliza quietly spoke.
"I'm going to make some calls okay? I'll be right back." Billie turned around to kiss Aliza's head before she slowly scooted out of bed and went into her office.
She made a few calls and cancelled her run for tonight and also told Natasha that it was okay for her to head home since it was getting late.
"Since you probably don't have a big appetite I brought fruit." Billie pushed the door open and slowly walked into the room, turning the bedside lamp on and climbing back into bed.
"Is he dead?" Aliza asked, her voice breaking.
"Yeah. He's dead baby." Billie laid on her side, pulling Aliza closer to her and rubbing her arm gently with her fingertips.
"I can't look at my body the same...." Alizas voice cracked right before she completely broke into tears and Billie sat up, tapping the crying girl, signaling for her to sit up.
"It's okay baby. Don't cry, you're safe." Billie embraced the girl tightly, not letting go for a single second.
"I want to be okay." Aliza wept into Billie's chest while clenching her shirt tightly in her hands.
"I know. I'm here, it's okay."
After a while of crying Aliza pulled out of the hug, her eyes stinging and basically swollen shut.
    "You okay?" Billie asked while moving the hair out of the girls face.
    Aliza only hummed quietly and nodded, hugging Billie once more.   
    "I'm exhausted." Aliza whispered.
"I know. I know. Here, lie down. Let me grab a book." Billie helped Aliza position herself onto her side of the bed before she reached over to the bedside table and turned the lamp on, then reaching for a book.
     Aliza found herself laying on Billie's chest while she gently read aloud with her quiet, wispy voice.
After Aliza had completely fallen asleep Billie just laid there until she got an idea.

"Good morning Minnie." Billie beamed, turning over to the girl.
"Morning." She mumbled in her raspy voice.
"Feel any better Minnie? Anything I can do to help?" Billie asked while pulling the girl in for a hug.
"I'm fine Bil." She replied with zero emotion.
Billie took a minute to respond but when she did it brought a smile upon Aliza's sad face.
    "I love you, and I'm glad you're okay." Billie started and Aliza gave her a gentle smile.
     "I am so fucking sorry I wasn't there to protect you Aliza."   
   Aliza saw the tears forming in Billie's eyes and it shattered her heart.
   "No... Bil. It's not your fault. I swear it's not."  Aliza sat up and grabbed Billie's hands, holding them tightly in her own, she kissed them.
    "I love you Billie but it's not your fault."
Billie let out a calm breath and kissed Aliza's cheek.
"We're going back to the house in LA. There it's so warm you can be in the pool everyday or take a walk or read in the garden." Billie quietly spoke while Aliza laid her head on Billie's chest.
"Nobody will hurt you there. It'll just be us... I promise." Billie added and Aliza only listened. She really didn't have anything to say. She was actually glad that they were going away.
"When are we leaving?" Is the only thing she said while tracing shaped on Billie's stomach.
"In a few hours. I want you to shower and take your time getting ready so you don't stress yourself. I already packed for both of us."