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❄Shaadi | BRIT❄

Reviewed by: ChristineAcedon

Title: Shaadi

Author's name: Uditasree

Cover: 8/10

You have a very cute and simple cover. It's endearing and promises a short, light, and heartwarming read. The color of the font is the only issue that I have as it took me a few minutes to be able to find 'ADI' on the cover. Graphic design is not something I'm great with and I have a horrible eye, so I'm not sure what colors to suggest for the font in order to make the title really stand out.

Title: 10/10

Very cute play on names. I didn't fully get it until I got to the end, but I believe that was just me being overly tired and dense. I really love how you make the title all about the characters and their story.

Blurb/Description: 6/10

The blurb for your story does draw up the interest; What happened? Why did he go missing? I do think that it needs some fine-tuning, if that makes sense? While you manage to get the plot across for your reader, the description seems a bit jumbled and rambling. You want to introduce the main character(s), the problem, what they stand to lose (or gain) and the setting. Right now, it seems like more of a muddled picture.

Blurbs are something I struggle with; always having more to say than that short description allows. There is a book on Wattpad by ray_of_sunshine9 called 101 Writing Tips from an Exhausted Reviewer. They break down the steps to make an effective blurb, as well as a multitude of other things if you'd like to check it out.

Creativity and originality: 10/10

I can honestly say I've never heard of another story of a missing grandparent at a wedding. You truly let your creativity take flight with this story and introduced everyone to a girl who simply loves her grandpa and who, maybe, struggles with doubts about what is to come. It's relatable and lighthearted without being overly cliché.

Plot and Flow: 18/20

You have a very cute story here, and it leaves a reader with a happy little feeling at the end. The story did, at times, give off the same rambling feeling of the blurb. For example in the first chapter, Shanti is talking about how early in the morning it is, jumps back to two years prior about going to a wedding with her mom at 4 AM, then back to her own wedding.

This may simply be an issue of me not understanding the culture (Side note: I love the little explanations and definitions you throw in to help your readers understand some of the language and cultural moments), but this is a moment that seems like more of a distraction. It doesn't do much for the story aside from putting us into the (in my opinion) distracted mind of the bride. This doesn't have to be a bad thing as it also gives us a glimpse into her mind and how she's feeling about everything; distracted and on edge and maybe even a little excited.

Character Development: 19/20

I wish there were more background into Aditya because he's adorably kind in this story, but I also understand that this is a short story from the bride's perspective and maybe she simply doesn't have all of that information to even relay to us? You use the prologue well in order to introduce the type of relationship and closeness that Shanti has with her dada. Though her dada may not be present in every scene physically, he is a large part of this story and establishing their bond is an important piece, so good job there. Shanti and Aditya's build-up seemed a bit rushed, and from what I understand, they may not know each other that well. It would be interesting to possibly get a flashback or glimpse of their first meeting and Shanti's thoughts on Aditya.

Writing style: 9/10

You have an amazing and unique voice and I look forward to reading more of your work. The only critique I have is, again, that in some places it seems a bit hard to follow the plot. I would just read it through a few more times, sometimes doing this out loud will bring different issues to light regarding flow and even grammar.

Grammar, spellings, etc.: 8/10

There were some mistakes throughout which, I believe, are primarily translation issues. An example is in chapter one, "he gave me an advice" which should read, 'he gave me some advice' or even, 'he advised me...' I also noticed a few instances where you were missing commas.

Overall, the mistakes didn't truly take away from the story and the ability to understand it, however I would recommend taking the time to read through, or seeing if there would be anyone willing to help you proof (sometimes it's easier for others to spot the mistakes because they're looking at the story with fresh eyes).

Genre relevance: 10/10

It is exactly as advertised; a short story. I would also almost categorize it as a little rom-com maybe?

Overall: 90/100

I thoroughly enjoyed this little life lesson as narrated by Shanti. I won't spoil the ending, but I loved it when I found the reason we were 'hearing' this story at all. I'm so happy that you reached out to share this with me as I don't often read short stories and sometimes forget what I'm missing out on because of that. I think if you get the chance to go through and just fine-tune the spelling and grammar as well as work on a smoother flow in some places, Shanti's story can shine even more.  

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