Aurora Costello.

Chapter 42.

I've been laying in this hospital bed motionless for about 4 hours. I'm supposed to be sleeping but I'm finding that really difficult with all these strange people sitting around me. So instead I've been laying here with my eyes shut.

The doctor said something about a heart attack, concussion and brain fog which should only last for another 6-8 hours.

So I have 2-4 hours left of brain fog. Enthralling I know.

"Why don't you all head down to get some food, I'll stay in here in case she wakes up and then when you come back I'll go get my own food" I hear a deep masculine voice rumble throughout the room and by heart skips a beat. His words a followed by many footsteps and the doors finally shutting closed.

"I know you're awake Costello" I hear him speak softly as I feel his presence near my bed

Opening one eye I feign tiredness and pretend I'm just waking up "well I am now, who are you?" I say back trying to hide my blush

"I'm blade" he says as he takes a seat

"You may not remember anything strawberry but I want you to know we where all really worried about you. Especially me, the last thing I'd ever want is something to happen to you whilst you where mad at me." He rambles on

"Why was I mad?" I question ignoring the stupid nickname he came up with on the spot

"Urm. I'm sure you'll remember soon" he whispers putting his head down "just remember I had my reasons and I will spend every waking moment making it up to you" he finishes

My heart constricts at that, but not in a fatal heart problem way, in a way that makes me feel something for this man in front of me. A way that makes me think he could be very special to me one day.

We talk a bit more and he gets a bit more comfortable talking to me but doesn't really let much spill, he keeps calling my strawberry but after about an hour I'm starting to like it.

I start to feel a bit tired and feel my self drift off into a foggy sleep with his hand drawing circles in my palm which lays next to my body.

Peeling my eyes open I'm met with the bright day light and am instantly hit with a fresher feeling than I did when my eyes closed. My hands are wrapped around a small teddy and I can feel my IV drip piercing into my skin. I look around and see everyone surrounding me asleep and a small lady nurse writing something down on a chart humming.

She doesn't notice me as she walks out the room and I need to pee. So that's what I get up to do, taking out my IV and all the other wires attached to me I sit up and silently regret it as my eyes go dark from moving too quickly. Pushing the dizziness away I stand on my feet and make way to the bathroom door across the room. Greeted with a small room, a toilet with a railing next to it, a pretty low down sink and a weird looking shower that looks like it should be in an old people's room rather than a hospital.

I do my business in the toilet and whilst washing my hands I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I rear back with who looks back at me. She looks like a ghost. Her normally brushed out hair is a tangled dreadlock, her normally tanned skin is as pale as paper with scratches and scars littering all over her face. She has skinny arms and her ribs are poking out even through the hospital gown. Her arms are filled with dark purple bruises and her legs are shaking so badly her hands have to grip onto the sink for support.

But what catches my eye is the necklace wrapped around my frail neck. It has an A at the bottom and is wrapped in what looks to be an imitation or thorns.

And then the dizziness hits me as memories come flooding into my brain at record speed. My 'parents' getting arrested, meeting my real parents and my brothers, the abuse, the rape, the court sentencing, the mafias, the underground, Russia, the funeral, Alexandre, blade.

The memories weigh on me like a tonne of bricks and I'm left with the consuming feeling of wishing my memory was still gone, because with these memories comeback the feelings of not wanting to live the life I've been destined for. The anxiety of the pain I'm yet to face. The overbearing feeling of failure and the seeking to be better.

I grasp onto my forehead as if holding it will lessen the impending migraine coming in full force to haunt me further.

I hear the softened talking of everyone in the room and the doctors walking in, I hold back a sob and feel my hands shake. Feeling my heart pounding I decide it's best I head back into the room to calm my self down and remind myself why I came back to America in the first place.

My reasons.

My happiness.

So with a shaky breath I limp back into the room heading straight for papa, he's always been more comfortable then any bed in the world. I stand in front of him looking down as he looks up with glossy eyes

"Hey papa" I whisper

"Ciao mi princesa" he whispers back and I launch myself at him and get comfortable in his lap, nuzzles my face into his chest and allowing myself to be vulnerable. I don't care whose here to witness it.

"Aurora dear, we have a few things we'd like to discuss with you now your memory and mind fog has gone" the male lead doctor voices softly

"Ok" I say back confidently sitting up but still pressed against my dad.

"Sweetie you need to be connected to your IV your severely dehydrated. You can stay with your dad but while doctor Filipe speaks im going to insert it back in along with your monitors" the nurse that I'm starting to get familiar with words patiently and very sweetly.

I nod at her turning my focus onto doc

"Ok Aurora first we need to talk about your heart. We're going to try our first efforts at widening the valve in your heart later on today. We need you to rest and keep calm in preparation. We've given you some heart medicine to keep the blood pumping and flowing but we won't be able to give you any further medication as we need your blood to be clear when we sedate you for the procedure. Honey, we also need you to be aware that if this procedure doesn't work, open heart surgery to replace the valve will need to take place, we're hoping we won't need to, but 70% of the time the valve closes up again. Normally we wouldn't need to operate but seeing as you had a major heart attack we may just need to do that sweetheart." One of the doctors voice skillfully and I listen whilst playing with my dads fingers.

"Moving on from that momentarily, we have a few tests we'd like to run lovely. You have some concerning bruises on your body and we'd like to do a rape kit to make sure your okay. We'd also like you to take to our team therapist just in case"

By now everyone is out of the room except my parents and my mama's parents. I tense automatically tears brimming in my eyes as I realise the severity of what he just said.

Rape kit.

STD's

Pregnancy

I was raped.

My heart monitors beeps and my eyes blur through all the tears, I realise I'm panicking and whose left in the room are all trying to calm me, failing miserably.