My Princessa

Chapter 64

After my conversation nonna I don't think I'll ever look at had the same way. She looks so strong but I could see ever since I came back how shaken she is.
I followed her out as soon as she went she left. I needed to understand her or at least I needed her to understand me because she seems like the only person who does. I don't blame everyone in this house though they don't know what it feels like.
I knocked on her room but there was no answer so I decided to go in and then she was in her bed crying. I quickly moved towards and held her as she cried.
"I just want my son to wake up "she said crying and l cried with her.
"This life is hurting us, I don't wanna live like this anymore, it's taking away everything from us it's almost like it's sucking the happiness out of us. I don't want this riches if it means that will never see happiness. If it means that my grandchildren will never be happy. I'm tired of this misery. I'm tired of seeing my children get hurt. It was never supposed to be like this he promised me, he promised me that all children will never go through what we went through but he lied.
I don't blame him you know. I am the one to blame. I should've left I should've left this life. I shouldn't have done to my son into this life. I just wish my son had the freedom to dream. I wish all of them had but Teo had it the worst. My poor son was deemed to be the leader even before he was born. He was given this life on a silver platter. But this life has only given him you misery.
If it weren't for this life Selena wouldn't have given you're away. You wouldn't have had to suffer the way you did in your childhood and your teenage hood. I don't like how she went about it but she made the right decision for you. She was a better woman than me.
l blamed her when I found out. But she's not in evil. She's just a mother who thought she was doing the best for her child. She knew what she signed up for like me. But when she saw the consequences she decided to act. Yes she went about it the wrong way are you Rosa. But that doesn't mean she was wrong." She cried bitterly.
"Go away from here so. Go away before the sins of your father and your grandparents catch up to you. These wars will never stop. It's already too late for your brothers but it's not too late for you. So go away, save your life and save your brothers lives as well because as long as you are here they will never have peace. Dear enemies will view you is the weakness and they will always hurt you first in order to get your brothers so don't let them. Go away my little princess." she said holding my face.
"But dad" l said in horror.l understand where she is coming from but l can't leave without seeing dad or talking to him.

....

"You're misunderstanding me Rosa. I know how much you love your father and how much he loves you so how can l tell you to leave without him or at least leave without seeing him for talking to him.
I'm just saying that as soon as all of this is over, then run. Run as far from this place is possible. They will try to stop you but don't let them. You will never know peace and happiness in this place. This place has already taken so much from you. Don't let it take the little you have left. Go out there and find yourself without this family and their sins is holding you back.
This life is not for the faint hearted. Don't get me wrong Rosa. I'm not saying that your weak rather you are the strongest person in this whole place. But this place will suck the life out of you. You will become a shadow of yourself if you stay here. Go out there and live your life. Be a teenager" she continued but l couldn't listen to more because l knew she was right.
l left her room and went to dad's. All my brothers were there. They were all sleeping beside him like his bodyguards and I couldn't help but smile. How can I even dream of leaving them behind. How can I even build a life without them. They were the reason I smiled. The reason I looked forward to a new day. I just can imagine how that feel if I left them behind. I don't ever want them to fill rejected or abandoned. I never want them to feel like l didn't love them or that I love them any less.
But I knew nonna was right. I needed to be independent. I needed to find myself without people shielding me and stopping me from falling. I needed to fall and also learn how to get up myself.
I love them to death but it's time. It's time that I learn to be me without them. So I am making a promise to myself. That as soon as dad wakes up then I'm out of here. I will hill away from this place. Then I'll come back a better version of me, a stronger version if that is even possible.
"they miss him "I heard nonno behind me. He looked just as tired as the rest. But he also seems like his heart was breaking. I don't blame him though. No no was pushing everyone away. And judging by how close they are. I knew it was hurting him the most. But I also understand why Nonna is angry at him. Part of her holds him accountable for what happened to me and dad.
"You okay "I asked him with the sympathetic looking. Elena and her family were still hurting us. She was still ruining us internally. I hate what our families turning into. I hate the quietness of this house. Everyone in this house looks haunted and tired. There is neither peace no happiness.
Despite having let me go and dad surviving, they still won. Elena still got her revenge .

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