Cruel love

Chapter 44 Barbara

Enzo stood up to dispose of the condom After our orgasm I laid on the bed catching my breaths and a racing heart. Enzo came across me and started gathering his clothes from the floor and dressing. I stood up and sat on the bed, I held his wrist stopping him midway putting on his pants.

He glared at me with narrowed eyes like warning me to stop. But I didn't. I won't let this keep on going between us. We need to talk to each other. Communication is very important in a relationship. Especially in our future*ked up one. I pulled him and he let me. I know he is way stronger than me and could free himself from my hold and leave but he didn't. He let his pants fall and came to bed with me.

He lied next to me and put my head on his chest. One leg over his. His body was stiff and rigid under my skin. I stroked his chest encouraging him to let loose. He loosened after a few strokes and wrapped his arm around my waist.

I love it. I missed it so much. This cuddling session after sex. This moment when we let each other see each other's true selves, our raw selves. Baring our mind our thoughts.

And we are having it. We are living it. Finally.

"I missed this so much", I waited for a couple of moments waiting for him to reply but he didn't. I continued.
"I missed us so much".

"Really, because you are the one who left me behind choosing the man that you met just then, over me.
You told me that you love me and then you leave me.
You showed me you love me only to leave me.
You left me without even talking to me, without even explaining yourself.
You left me without even sparing a glance at me".

His every word was like a stab to my heart. As he spoke my heart pained and bled even more. I know he was hurt and it hurt me, and me being the cause of it hurt me even more. I stayed quiet listening to him.

"You know how it make me feel..... Pissed so fu*king pissed."

"I....I am s..so very sorry" I said with so much pain. I was sorry for hurting him. I was in so much pain. My throat was so full of emotions that it made me stammer.

"But I didn't have any other choice. This world would never accept us. Me being the daughter of Pakhan, you being Capo. We are just.....just not meant to be together".

"That's the difference between you and me, I would choose you in a beat without even caring what is on the other side. Because I know I would fight anything, anyone with you by my side.
But you think about everything else but me".

"That's not true Enzo. I did this all because of you. I knew it would just hurt you and me but it was the right thing to do.
You think I didn't feel anything.
I was so broken, sometimes I would think about our time together and it made me feel good.
I knew I couldn't have you we are not meant to be. But I am glad I had it.
I can live with all the beautiful moments you gave me Enzo.
Sometimes I used to think why God made us meet if we couldn't be together but you know what Enzo I would do it all over again even if it means I can't have you in the end.
Because the moments you gave me are so special to me.
I will fall for you every time even if I knew I would burn me at the end every time".

With that he brought his lips to mine and kissed me. He kissed me and held me like I am the only one him too. He kissed me like he missed me.
He didn't said it but he showed it to me. Enzo talks but he didn't talked mushy but he showed it with that kissed.
He showed his forgiveness through that kiss.

When we moved apart I rested my head on his chest happy to make up. He caressed my back with his one hand, other on one strand of my hari twisting it on his fingers.

"You know I thought I hate you. I hate you so much,I would destroy you for making me feel that way. But when I saw you for the first time after that day. I knew I couldn't hate you. I was pissed at you, but I couldn't hate you, I couldn't do anything to harm you".

"I know you would never hurt me or harm me anyway Enzo. I trust you".

He gave me a smile, a genuine smile and his eyes warmed. They finally warmed up for me. Like they always had to me.

I sighed. Finally.

"You have the most beautiful eyes Enzo Russo".

His smile widened turning into a grin.

"I missed you too my sweetheart".

He called me sweetheart. I didn't even know how much I liked it until he stopped calling me that.
But today he finally referred to me as his sweetheart.
The butterfly in my stomach went wild sending flutter to my tummy.

I held him tight with my leg. All night we talked. I told him about college and Susie. He told me about his work lately and about how annoying Dante is. I laughed at that.
I told him about Liam's new obsession with football. Well it's not new but the way he is pursuing it is new and Lily is smarter and smarter every day.
He told me Linda misses me.

When it was around four Enzo stood up and got dressed and left. I was sad he was going but I was more happy that we finally sorted everything out.

Though we didn't talk about our future, our present was beautiful.
Things would get harsh for us but we will figure something out.
If we are together we could fight the biggest battles. I was a fool to not realise it before.