Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── i'll spend forever wondering if you knew. ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
i lay in bed, the sound of rain softly tapping against the window, each drop echoing the emptiness that filled the space once occupied by billie. six years together, and now it feels like an eternity since we last shared our lives. memories flood my mind, both beautiful and agonizing, and i can't help but wish i could unrecall how we almost had it all.
it was legendary. the night she looked into my eyes and told me, "you're the love of my life." her voice was full of certainty, and in that moment, the world melted away. it was just us, the stars, and a promise that felt unbreakable.
it was momentary. the laughter we shared while cooking dinner, her singing off-key as i tried to keep a straight face. we were silly and carefree, spinning around the kitchen, lost in our own little world. those moments felt infinite, like we could hold onto them forever.
it was unnecessary. the way our arguments escalated, like a volcano ready to erupt. i still remember the pain in her eyes when we fought over nothing, the harsh words we hurled at each other like weapons. i wanted to take it all back, but the damage was done.
should've let it stay buried. the night we dug up old wounds, memories that should have stayed hidden. sitting in the living room, we brought up everything we'd tried to forget. the past came crashing back, and suddenly, all those old scars reappeared, raw and fresh.
oh, what a valiant roar. the fight that felt like a battlefield, the anger spilling out of us. i can still hear her voice raised, filled with frustration and hurt. we both fought like warriors, but the truth was we were just two broken people, lost in a battle we couldn't win.
what a bland goodbye. standing at the door, our eyes locked, knowing we were about to walk away from everything. no grand gestures, no final words—just a quiet, heavy silence that settled between us, saying more than either of us ever could. it felt like the end of everything.
the coward claimed she was a lion. the times billie would put on a brave face, acting like everything was okay when inside, she was crumbling. she'd smile and pretend she was strong, but i could see through it. her strength felt like a mask, one that hid the truth beneath.
i'm combing through the braids of lies. the promises we made tangled together, like the messy strands of hair she used to braid in my fingers. i remember her saying, "i'll never leave," and how those words felt like a lifeline. now, i think back and whisper, "nevermind."
our field of dreams engulfed in fire. the plans we made—marriage, kids, a dog and a cat, a life together. those dreams felt so real, yet they burned away like embers in the night, leaving nothing but ash and regret in their wake.
your arson's match your somber eyes. billie's battles with her own demons, the weight of her depression pulling us apart. i could see it in her eyes, the darkness lurking beneath, threatening to consume everything we'd built. i tried to fight for us, but the fire was too strong.
and as i lie here, tears pooling in my eyes, i realize that i'll still see it until i die. she's the loss of my life.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── i was enchanted to meet you. ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
