~Butterflies And Blushes~

~Chapter 44~

I don't know what's wrong.
But.
The ignorance that she is throwing towards me is heart wrenching. It's breaking me.

I was busy with surgeries and more surgeries which I couldn't ignore since I was the SR handling all the major ones now, but still I called Shri numerous number of times in the little time that I got in between but she didn't respond to them.

I waited for her outside her class but she didn't listen to me there as well. She walked pushing me away.
I waited outside her hostel but there too she pushed me away.

I seriously don't understand what's wrong.
Sab sahi tha, toh phir achanak se kya hua. Did I do anything wrong?
Everything was okay untill Dad's birthday.
I waited for the past four days. I thought Shri would come and talk like she always does. I stood at every place that she could come to me and talk it out. But now enough is enough.
She knows I can't enter inside her girl's hostel isiliye mhuje dekhar directly hostel bhag jati hai.
But enough of her ignorance. I need to know what's wrong. I need to know why she is behaving all different. I need to.
(Everything was fine, then what happened suddenly?)
(She know I can't enter her hostel so she runs there on seeing me.)

I was determined to talk to her today, as I waited for her outside her lecture Hall. She came out alone and without sparing a look towards me she began walking away.
I ran to her and held her hand. She did what she had been doing from the past few days, began removing her hand from my hold without saying a single word.
Yeah I haven't heard her voice since the past four days.
Tears began lacing my eyes as I saw the distantness in her eyes.
What is it? Why is she behaving like this?
Why is she not talking to me?
Did I do something wrong? If that's so then why is she not conveying?
I am ready to listen. I am ready to apologize if I did anything wrong. I am ready to apologize otherwise as well.
But I can't take this anymore. I just can't.

"Shri. Stop struggling. I won't leave this time.
I need to talk to you. I won't leave without knowing and understanding what's wrong. ", I told her sharply as she continued with her struggle to get out of my hold.
I was holding her with enough caution not to hurt her but also not to leave her.
Her classmates and other students began gathering around.

" What! Drama chal raha hai? Koi kam-dhanda nahi hai tum logo ko! ", I shouted sharply at all of them knowing very well how much Shri hated attention. I know I am the one pulling up the drama but I got no other option.

People got scared by my demeanor for sure as I saw them sprint away.
(What? Is some drama going on? Don't you'll have any work to do?)

Shri looked at me with that gaze of hers. She looked so pale and drained. Her eyes looked devoid of sleep.
What's wrong Shri. Please.. Please bata mhuje. Please baat kar mhujse.
(Please tell me.. Please talk to me.)

Her eyes were screaming the requests to let her go.
Maybe I was being adamant.

"Shri.. Ek baar. Just ek baar bata mujhe please. Kya hua hai? Maine kuch kiya? Kisine kuch kaha? Please bata. Hum baat karte hai na. Let's talk it out. Please. Teri ignorance maar rahi hai mhuje. Maar jaunga mei aise! ", I said it out.
As I said those last words she quickly placed her palm of my mouth.
Motioning me not to say so by nodding her head in a no.
Her eyes teared while mine too did.
And then suddenly she bursted out into tears. Her head lightly hit my chest but she still didn't hug me, just continued crying.
I pulled her into my chest, my arms holding her securely.
She was in so much pain. She was crying so badly. Her cries were making me feel the pain that she was going through. Atleast a bit of it.
Though now I fear what all she is holding within herself.
Thankfully the entire floor was empty and nobody was there to witness her cry so badly.
(Shri.. Just once..just once talk to me. Tell me what's wrong. Did I do anything?
Did someone say anything? Just tell me..please.. Let's talk it out please.
Your ignorance is killing me. I'll die like this. )