Lost Love [ Taekook FF ]

Chapter 16

"Because I love you!" Jungkook yelled, his voice raw and filled with emotion. His grip on Taehyung's shoulders tightened as if he was afraid Taehyung would disappear if he let go. "I fucking love you, Taehyung. I've loved you since the moment I first saw you... since the day my eyes landed on you and everything in me shifted. Every time I acted like I hated you... it was just me hating myself for not being able to tell you the truth. I love you so much that it hurts imagining you with someone else."

Tears brimmed in Jungkook's eyes, his lips quivering as he clenched his fists beside Taehyung's face. His body trembled, as he continued, "It kills me knowing you have a family and I'm not a part of it." The words slipped, along with jungkook's tears.

He can't take it anymore, just the thought of tae not being a part of his future made him to not have a one. He can't imagine his future, if tae's not a part of it.

"You... what?" Taehyung's voice was barely a whisper, his mind struggling to comprehend what he had just heard.

Jungkook moved closed, his forehead resting on tae's. "I've been pretending to hate you for so long, just so I could be close to you. I've never hated you, Tae, not for a second. I've loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you, but I was a coward to not express my feelings." the words left in a whisper, the pain clearly visible in each word that left his mouth.

Tae stayed quite, the words still processing in his mind, Jungkook, love me?, the thought was revolving in his head, making him feel dizzy. There was a second of silence before Jungkook continued.

"I didn't know what else to do. I thought if I stayed close to you, even as your enemy, it would be enough. But it wasn't. It's never been enough."
Jungkook confessed, his voice low and tired. Everything which he had been holding onto himself for so long finally get a voice.

Taehyung's heart twisted painfully, the shock of Jungkook's confession overwhelming him. He had never imagined-never even considered-that Jungkook could feel this way about him. The idea seemed impossible.

"You love me?" Taehyung whispered, pushing jungkook slowly, his voice barely audible. "And this is how you show it? By treating me like I'm nothing but a rival? By making up these lies in your head? By assumeing things and then reacting on it?"

Jungkook's face crumpled, his voice trembling. "I didn't mean to- I thought you were with someone else. I thought you had a family, and I couldn't-"

"You thought wrong!" Taehyung snapped, his anger returning with full force. "You never asked me, Jungkook. You never even tried to understand. You just assumed, you love me, right? Then why you didn't asked?"

The words are filled with anger, frustration, hurt. Knowing Jungkook gave up on him so easily is boiling inside him. He said he love me right? Then how can he gave up so easily, why didn't he fight?

Tae doesn't know if he should be shock that Jungkook -one who pretended to be his enemy- love him, or angry about the fact that his love was so weak that a mare misunderstanding made him gave up.

Tae doesn't feel anything for jungkook, atleast not something so strong to call 'love'. But just by knowing Jungkook, who claimed to love him, gave up on his love just because he assumed tae has a partner, made his heart burn -in a flame which never ignited.

Jungkook's breath hitched, the guilt weighing down on him like a ton of bricks. He had made a mess of everything, all because of his own insecurities and fears.

"I didn't know how to tell you," Jungkook whispered, his voice breaking. "I was scared. Scared that you'd push me away. I thought, if we stay like that maybe... maybe one day, i would be able to tell you about my feeling but then when I saw her... I thought I'd lost you."

Taehyung's chest tightened at the sight of Jungkook's vulnerability, but his anger still simmered beneath the surface. "You didn't lose me, Jungkook. You never had me."

The words cut deep, and Jungkook flinched as if he had been physically struck. His hands loosened their grip on Taehyung, and he stepped back, looking utterly defeated.

Taehyung took a deep breath, trying to steady his racing heart. As a tear left his eye, without him knowing. "I don't have a partner," he said, his voice cold now but still laced with pain. "Yes, I have a daughter, but that has nothing to do with me being in a relationship. You jumped to the worst possible conclusion without ever asking me. You made this whole mess up in your head. You hold the knife so tightly that it ended up cutting you, while you were busy blaming the one who was holding the knife." tae's voice was filled with pain.

Jungkook stared at him, his eyes wide with shock. "You're... you're not with anyone?"

Taehyung shook his head, his gaze steady. "No. She's only my daughter. I'm not hiding some secret partner. You were wrong, Jungkook. You've been wrong this whole time."

Jungkook's knees almost gave up, the weight of his misunderstanding crashing down on him. He had let his own fears destroy everything, and now, as he left the knife, he could see the wound it left behind.

"I'm s-sorry," Jungkook whispered, his voice barely audible. "I'm so, so sorry."

Taehyung sighed, his anger flew away, leaving behind only exhaustion and a dull ache in his chest. "You hurt me, Jungkook," he said quietly. "You hurt yourself too. All of this could have been avoided if you had just... talked to me."

Jungkook nodded, tears welling up in his eyes. "I know. I messed up. I let my feelings... I let them ruin everything. But trust me, I'll make everything right, Tae, I l-love you. I can't lose you."

Tae might not know what jungkook is feeling or what he felt all this time but one thing he knew that, love is not something to gave up on. How should he truat jungkook, knowing if something happens again, maybe again jungkook would give up..

After today, one thing is sure that, he doesn't hate Jungkook, but that doesn't mean he feel something for him. He doesn't love jungkook -nit in a way jungkook do - but he care. Not knowing why, but yes, he doesn't hate him, maybe he never did?

"I can't! I don't know where we go from here," Taehyung admitted, his voice thick with emotion. "I can't trust you," Taehyung continued, his voice breaking. "Not after everything. You assumed things and took action on it. You hid your feelings from me. How am I supposed to believe you now?" His gaze was firm, but inside, a storm raged-confusion battling.

Each word struck Jungkook like a dagger, the hurt visible on his face. "I-" he started, but Taehyung cut him off with a piercing glare.

"Trust is earned, not given, Jungkook."

The pain in Jungkook's chest was like a hard grip, squeezing tighter with each passing moment. He felt the sting of rejection, but beneath that pain, a flicker of determination ignited. This time, he vowed silently, he wouldn't allow his fears to dictate his actions. He would prove to Taehyung that his love was real, that he was worth trusting.

This time he won't wear the mask,-won't pretend to be something he's not. He'll show Tae the love of Jeon Jungkook. He had already lose tae without even having him, and the pain he felt was something he can never be able to bear again. This time he won't care, what people think about him, the only person matter to him is his Tae.

Jungkook took a step closer, his eyes filled with a determination, "I won't give up on you, Tae. I'll show you how much I love you. I'll earn your trust, no matter what it takes." His voice was soft.

Taehyung looked away, trying to mask the turmoil inside him, the conflicting emotions swirling inside him. He felt nothing for Jungkook, yet a part of him is scared... Scared of Jungkook's determination. He doesn't want to fall for Jungkoook. He doesn't want Jungkook to be a part of his fucked up life. But, alas! It's already too late to stop all this.

"I need time, Jungkook," he said quietly, his voice laced with exhaustion. "I can't deal with this right now."

Without waiting for a response, Taehyung turned on his heel, his footsteps echoing through the empty corridor. Jungkook watched him go, his heart sinking as the distance grew between them, but he didn't call out. He knew Taehyung needed space.

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