Midnight love {Nika Muhl}

Part 34

Violet Montgomery

It's getting closer to Christmas. It snowed for the first time this week. Finals are in full swing and people are studying harder than ever. I love Christmas. It's my favorite time of year. Winter here in Connecticut is beautiful. The snow fall soft and covers all the trees. It piles up and dosent melt until February.

In Wyoming the wind blows and the snow melts and gets all slushy. I love Christmas because of the smells and the food and most of all getting to spend it with my friends and family. Well the second part of that I'm not so sure of anymore.

I still haven't talked to my parents after the whole Thanksgiving coming out thing. But I've texted my sisters. Most of it being me apologizing and them replying back with short messages always being sure to reiterate that they are not mad at me.

This morning I sent them a message. "Just wondering what y'all's plans for Christmas are. Love you." I have yet to have a response not that I've checked my phone regularly. As I am studying for my exams.

Not that I text very many people anymore anyway. Me and nika are on speaking terms. I go over to Azzi's and hangout. Our conversation never progress further than what we're up to and how we're doing. But she still looks at me the same way she always has. Like I could talk to her about absolutely nothing and she would listen for hours.

She smiled when I laugh. And I miss her some nights. Most nights. I have gotten over the anger I once held towards her. I understand now that she was in a hard situation and she listened to her heart and not her head. I just wish we could have been different. Because I think under any other slightly better circumstances we would still be together. I wish we were but I value myself too much to do that.

As I finally wrapped up my notes for my first final I decided to head to the dinning haul and get some dinner before heading back to my dorm for the night. Once I finally made it back to my dorm. I discarded my backpack and shoes and climbed into bed with my full to go container of food.

As I opened my container I also unlocked my phone seeing I had a message from my sisters. "Hey vi. We were thinking it would be best if we spent Christmas with our own families." That was all no love you nothing.

What do they mean their own families. Was I not apart of their families. All my sisters live in Wyoming so I know it will probably just be our regular family get together minus me.

I knew that coming out to my family would affect our relationships but never did I think I would be uninvited from Christmas. What am I supposed to do. Who am I supposed to spend Christmas with. I already bought them all gifts am I just supposed to keep them? I feel so upset. And I feel the hot tears begin to streak down my cheeks.

My appetite is lost and I feel my breathing becoming more rushed. In the spur of the moment I decided I need to talk to someone. So I slip on my shoes and I'm out the door of my dorm.

Nika muhl

          I laid in bed scrolling aimlessly through Instagram for going on hour 2 now. I had finished my notes for my first final yesterday as I knew today I had practice. Which ended about 3 hours ago. It's getting late and I know I need to shower and go to bed in order to be up early for my workout and study session before my first class tomorrow.

I roll over on my side deciding I will watch one more TikTok then get up and go shower when o hear a quiet knock on my door. I wait a moment expecting one of my many teammates to barge through the door. But when no one does I get up and begin to walk to the door whilst wondering who it could be.

When I open the door to reveal her short figure I am taken aback. Her hairs tied up into a messy ponytail and she's wearing one of her many festive red sweaters along with a pair of black leggings and her Ugg boots. When she looks up to me I can see that her cheeks are stained with tears and her eyes are blood shot and puffy.

She doesn't say anything. But she doesn't have to. I open my arms and she's leant up against my chest. I closed the door and wrapped my arms around her. I felt her shake lightly as she cried. We haven't talked more than small talk in weeks but I will always be here for her no matter what.

I leant down moving her hair to one side of her neck and tucking my head into the now clear crook. She wrapped her arms around my neck and tucked her head into the crook of my neck. I stood up fully know her feet coming off the ground. Sometimes I forget that I'm so much taller than her.

I moved us over to my bed and sat down. She never tore her body away from mine as she made herself comfortable. She continued to cry sniffling  lightly. Once I felt her begin to gather herself. I pulled her face out of the crook of my neck holding it in both hands. As I brushed the hair away from her face that had stuck to her hot tears.

She looked at me her eyes puffy and red. Her lips swollen. I placed gentle kisses on her cheeks. "Do you want to tell me what wrong?" I said still holding her face in my hands. She nodded her head before crawling further up onto my bed and slumping against the pillows. I followed her and laid next to her. She cuddled up to my side wrapping my arm around her shoulders our body's facing each other.

"My family dosent want me to come home for Christmas. And I don't know what I'm supposed to do." She said her voice broke my heart. She looked so genuinely hurt and upset. I feel a ball of guilt in my chest. This is my fault. But I known I can't do anything to change that. "You can stay with me." I said trying to sound as comforting as possible.

"You're not going home?" She said turning to me surprised. "Not if you aren't." I said shrugging my shoulders. "No nika you have to go home and see your family." She said her voice stern. "Then come with me?" I said surprising her and myself.

"I mean you don't have to but I just don't want you to be alone." I said trying to not sound so desperate. "I'll think about it." She said. "Really?" I questioned her. "Yes really. Now can we please go to bed I have an early workout tomorrow." She said pulling the duvet over herself. "Of course I have an early one too." I said cuddling up next to her.

It wasn't long before we were both fast asleep. With hopes of what this upcoming winter break could bring for us.