Bound By Blood.

ch.36~Were you sent by someone?

"Why you think I would ever WANT or NEED your help, baffles me. 

I'm disgusted by you. 

I REGRET ever knowing you."

Recovered translated correspondents between Order Member Alexandra Brooks, to Death Easter Mattheo Riddle, 2003.

Order safe house, Unknown location, 2003.

Alexandra.  

The darkness around me swirls, thick and suffocating, each gasping breath tearing at the tender threads of reasoning still left intact in my mind. 

I thought we... 

Thought I...

We...

Yet here I am, crumpled on the cold floor, my heart as hollow as the air I struggle to draw in, burning and clawing at my throat.

Rage courses through me, stirring emotions I can barely contain.

But I know I have to.  

I'm lost, the promises that now feel like cruel jokes.

It was a joke. 

He never cared. 

I was nothing to him.

And just as despair threatens to consume me whole, the door bursts open, slamming against the wall with enough force to startle me from my spiraling thoughts.

"Alexandra! What happened?" Her voice is urgent, slicing through the haze, but even the sound of her concern feels distant. 

I can barely respond, a chaotic jumble of emotions crashing together in my chest as she kneels beside me.

"Please," Luna pleads, her luminous presence as bright as ever, the worry etched on her face almost grounding. "What happened? Talk to me!"

I shake my head, the weight of bitterness settling like a stone in my gut. "He didn't recognize me, Luna. He didn't even... didn't even know it was me."

She grips my shoulders, forcing me to look into her wide, caring eyes. "Oh Alexandra," She sighed, "I am so sorry..." she stopped, frantically looking back at the door, "But, Harry knows your back, he's preparing everyone for a briefing on your mission. You need to breath and pull it together. They can not know of this."

I look into Luna's eyes, and for a moment, the warmth from her gaze is a lifeline pulling me away from the chaos swirling in my mind. 

But then the truth hits me like a punch to the gut: I can't let them know about Matt-...Him. 

Not when we were in school, not whatever the fuck just happened. 

No one can know. 

Not when when the stakes are higher than ever. 

Not when darkness is creeping closer and shadows lurk behind every corner.

Not when they sent me in there for information, and I walked out a mess.

With a deep breath, I force the tendrils of pain and anger into a box in the back of my mind.

 "You're right. It's fine, It was a mission, I did it for Harry..." My voice trails off, panic gnawing at the edges of my calm facade.