Does Voldemort Even Lift, Bro?

Chapter 13: Year 5-- You and Whose Army II

Author's Note: For year 5, I've decided to try to update more often with smaller chapters.

I hope you enjoy!

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Harry strolled onto the train platform with all his admirers gawking at him as usual. Not that he would notice if some of them were muttering about whatever slanderous nonsense the newspapers may have printed. He assumed they were all in awe of his magnificent muscles.

A moment later, after his honeys bid their mum farewell, the trio found a cabin on the train where Lavender Brown was waiting for them. She and Parvati hugged and started chatting a mile a minute while Harry and Padma got their robes and badges on.

"Don't have too much fun without me," Parvati teased.

"I just hope it won't take too long," Padma replied. "I have a feeling Harry is going to do something-"

"Awesome?" he suggested with a grin.

"Something that will give me a headache," Padma said with a fond little sigh. "Would it kill you to try not to go all macho and ridiculous for once?"

"Yeah, it probably would," Harry shrugged. "I don't want to develop any bad habits."

Parvati and Lavender giggled at him. "I have a feeling you're going to drive Hermione extra crazy this year."

"Well, weren't you ladies going to try to hook her up with some dude so she would chill out?" he asked.

"That's easier said than done for someone like Hermione," Lavender answered. "For one thing, we'd have to drag her out of the library."

"And do so without being hexed," Parvati added.

"I have an idea, actually," Padma confessed.

"Really? Why haven't you said anything before now?" her sister wondered.

"I was just thinking about how Harry and I are going to have to do rounds as prefects sometimes," Padma said. "Since we're in different houses, normally we wouldn't be doing them at the same time. But, if we switched partners-"

"Then, Hermione would have to spend some alone time with Anthony Goldstein," Parvati finished with a huge smile. "Have I told you that you're brilliant lately?"

"Not nearly enough," Padma answered with a smug little grin.

"You're brilliant and beautiful, babe," Harry said as he wrapped an arm around her and helped her to her feet. "Now, how about we go see which lesser mortals have been chosen to make the two of us look totally amazing as prefects?"

She rolled her eyes even as they walked out the door.

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"Oh, you have got to be shitting me," Harry groaned as he walked into the prefects' meeting.

"What's the matter, Potter? Can't handle being in the company of real wizards?" Malfoy sneered.

Harry took two quick steps and smashed the little whiner's head into the wall, knocking him unconscious.

"What's the meaning of this?" one of the older students asked.