just pretend.

55.

They were forced to find a public place to talk, not able to keep their hands to themselves each time they tried to have a serious conversation. God knows they had tried – several times. The air around them was thick with unspoken words and a tangle of emotions that swirled like leaves in a storm. Minho glanced at Jisung, who was sitting next to him on the cramped bench, their fingers intertwined beneath the table as they waited for Seungmin to arrive. A small café bustled around them, the smell of fresh coffee mingling with baked goods wafting through the air, but the warmth of the environment did little to ease the tension building in Minho’s chest. They had decided to spend a night apart, away from each other, to think and clear their minds. But as Minho sat there, watching Jisung absentmindedly play with the hem of his shirt, he found himself struggling to sort through his chaotic thoughts, unsure of how to untangle the mess swirling inside his head. All he knew was that he loved them both fiercely and that he couldn’t live without either of them. For him, that was enough. Yet anxiety gnawed at him – what were the others feeling? Did they feel the same way? Were there still hidden currents of jealousy, hesitation, or something worse beneath the surface? Minho was scared that one of them had changed their mind after he had allowed himself to trust the fall into the unknown. Until now, their unconventional relationship felt right, but with the weight of their first real, serious conversation looming ahead, his nerves mounted. Jisung seemed to sense his inner turmoil, his warm, intense gaze boring into Minho’s soul like a lifeline in turbulent waters. “Baby”, Jisung said softly, leaning closer on the bench, the intimacy of the moment both comforting and alarming. Minho forced himself to meet his gaze, the apprehension pooling in his stomach. He was surprised by the softness radiating from Jisung’s eyes, the warmth that made his breath hitch in his throat. It was as if Jisung held a safe harbor within him, one that Minho desperately needed. “Are you worried that we won’t work out?”, Jisung asked, his voice gentle yet probing, and Minho nodded slowly, the admission almost painful. “Let me tell you something”, Jisung continued, his thumb caressing Minho’s nape with a feather-light touch that sent shivers down his spine. It was electrifying, gentle and possessive at the same time, as if Jisung was claiming him while simultaneously providing solace. “I love you. I have loved you ever since we started dating years ago, and I never stopped having feelings for you. That’s so much I can tell, okay? I love you, and I’m not going anywhere.” Jisung’s words wrapped around Minho like a warm blanket, and he nodded again, his heart doing backflips against his ribs. Jisung was his first love, the one who had shown him what it meant to feel deeply, and he thought he would only ever love him. But Seungmin had somehow found a way into his heart, and now he loved them both equally, the realization both exhilarating and terrifying. Just then, he heard Seungmin’s soft voice from the other end of the table, causing him to slightly flinch in Jisung’s grip but unable to suppress his smile. “I stand by that too.” The sincerity in Seungmin’s tone struck a chord in Minho, easing the tension in his chest a fraction more. Something deep inside him told him that his fears weren’t justified anymore, not after everything they had been through together, not after all the intimate moments they had shared – the whispered confessions, the stolen kisses, the laughter that filled the silences. Their connection felt solid, built on a foundation of trust and love that seemed unshakeable. Minho took a deep breath, the worries that had plagued him beginning to dissipate like morning mist, replaced by a renewed sense of hope and possibility.

They had decided to take it slow, everyone staying in their own apartments for now. It felt too early to make a serious move like living together. Instead, they chose to go on dates, just the three of them, taking the time to know each other better. Minho already felt like he knew both Jisung and Seungmin well enough to fall further, to risk taking the next step. But he also knew that Jisung and Seungmin still had a lot to learn about each other. From the moment they met, they had clashed – a constant push and pull that made their current bond seem almost surreal, like something out of a fever dream. Minho still didn’t quite understand how they had gotten here, but the way they now looked at each other, the way their touches lingered, convinced him that their feelings were genuine. Their first date together was at a cozy little café, where the air was thick with nervous excitement. Conversation flowed easily, stolen glances and brief touches under the table making Minho’s heart race. They had agreed to keep their relationship private, away from judging eyes, wanting this new, fragile connection to grow without outside interference. Yet, even in public, they couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Minho felt Jisung’s hand slowly slide up his thigh, teasing him under the table, the touch sending a shiver through his body. On the other side, Seungmin’s lips brushed against Minho’s neck, his warm breath ghosting over the now damp skin, forcing him to suppress a soft moan. “Okay, stop”, Minho whined quietly, shifting in his seat, but the playful smirk on Seungmin’s face made it clear he wasn’t going to make it easy for him. They ordered food, and as the evening wore on, Minho found himself sitting in the middle of the two men he loved, listening to their conversation as if they had always been this way, as if there had never been any tension between them. Jisung and Seungmin spoke easily now, the banter between them light and comfortable. The sight made Minho feel sentimental, his heart swelling with love and affection. He watched them, his chest tightening with emotion, knowing how much they both meant to him. They had saved him in their own ways – Jisung with his energy and determination, and Seungmin with his quiet and unwavering support. Minho couldn’t imagine his life without either of them. Things had started to feel right again. Minho had returned to dance practice, finding his rhythm once more, while Jisung had gone back to his job at the café, looking less exhausted than he had in weeks. Their lives, which had been so chaotic and uncertain, seemed to be settling into a better place. The future, once filled with doubt, now seemed full of possibility, and Minho couldn’t wait to see where it led. “Fuck what other people think”, he said suddenly, the words spilling out before he could stop himself. Jisung and Seungmin paused mid-conversation, turning to look at him with curious eyes. Before either of them could say anything, Minho pulled Jisung into a deep, passionate kiss, overwhelmed by the love he felt in that moment. Jisung’s lips were soft and familiar, the kiss lingering as Minho’s hand found its way up Seungmin’s chest, tugging him closer. Jisung barely had time to protest as Minho left a final soft peck on his lips before turning to Seungmin, pulling him into a kiss just as intensely. Seungmin’s hands immediately found their way around Minho’s waist, holding him close as if Minho was his anchor – and maybe he was. Minho wanted to believe that was true, that they were all anchors for each other, grounding each other through the chaos they had faced. They had endured so much together, fought battles that tested their strength, and lost parts of themselves along the way. But they had won, too. They had fought to reclaim their lives, won the hearing that had threatened to tear everything apart, and in the end, they had won each other.