Mi Appartieni

Chapter Twenty-Four

Nothing in this world could have prepared Joshua for what would be waiting for him when he walked into his apartment. He felt like he was looking into the eyes of a ghost.

He was here. Seokmin was in Boston, standing in Joshua's apartment, looking at him endearingly just a few meters away.

Joshua knew he was alive, but he didn't fully believe it until this very moment. Joshua drops the rest of his things on the floor, his hands too weak and sweaty to hold onto them.

Finally, Joshua finds his words. It was only one word, but it was the only thing he was able to form coherently. "Seokmin." Joshua says, barely above a whisper.

That was all it took. That one word - his name - was all Seokmin needed. He moves first. He strides over to Joshua with meaning, with determination. Joshua finally moves too, closing the gap between him and Seokmin that had never felt so big.

The two meet in the middle. Joshua wraps this arms around Seokmin's neck. Seokmin wraps his around Joshua's waist and lifts him up, holding onto him as his feet dangle in the air.

Joshua breathes in Seokmin's scent and for the first time in months, a wave of relief crashes over him. He's never felt more at ease than he does right now, in Seokmin's arms being lifted in the air by the man he missed so much.

"Seokmin." He breathes in relief as he holds onto Seokmin tightly, as if afraid he would disappear again if Joshua let go.

"Joshua." Seokmin breathes with the same inflection of relief.

Joshua feels the last of his stress  and tension dissolve at the sound of Seokmin's voice. He had no idea how much he missed this voice, how much he needed it until now.

"Il mio piccolo." (My little one). Seokmin whispers as he pats the back of Joshua's head. Seokmin slowly lowers Joshua to the ground, placing him on his feet with all the gentleness in the world. As if afraid to break him.

The two pull away to look at each other but stay impossibly close. Seokmin keeps his hands on Joshua's waist, afraid to let go. Joshua's hands fall on Seokmin's chest, his right hand right over his heart, feeling the rhythmic yet erratic beating.

Joshua looks up at Seokmin. He looks into those deep whiskey eyes that he never thought he would see again. The eyes that brought him a sense of relief.

It wasn't just his eyes. All of Seokmin was making Joshua feel like he could finally breathe again after two and a half long and agonizing months.

Just then, Joshua's vision becomes blotchy. His hands go numb and his knees threaten to buckle.

For the last two and a half months without Seokmin, Joshua had only gotten two hours of sleep a night. He was lucky to get four hours with the sleeping pills.

His body had been on survival mode, just trying to make it day by day without Seokmin. And now that Seokmin was back in his presence, back in his arms, Joshua finally felt at ease. He finally felt like he could relax and breathe with Seokmin's warmth back by his side.

The lack of sleep over the last two and a half months was catching up to him all at once. Joshua tried to fight it. He wanted - needed - to talk to Seokmin but it was no use. Joshua's vision goes completely black.

Seokmin's eyes go wide as he watches Joshua's eyes roll to the back of his head. He collapses but of course he never hits the floor. Seokmin catches him. He will always catch him. Always protect him and keep him safe.

Seokmin sinks to the floor, holding Joshua in his arms impossibly tight. Seokmin breathes heavily as he looks at Joshua's soft, gentle and relaxed face.