Mi Appartieni

Chapter Thirty-One

        Seokmin's eyes go wide as its his turn to freeze now. He, like Joshua, hadn't thought about that either. His mind was so wrapped up in Joshua that he hadn't even considered the inevitable future that lay ahead of them.

Seokmin felt his anger bubbling and the darkness looming over him as he now realized that yes, he would have to go back to Italy eventually.

Seokmin sighs and lowers his hands from Joshua's shoulders. He stands up and pulls Joshua's shaking body with him. Seokmin sits the two of them on the couch and securely clasps Joshua's hands in his own.

"Joshua." Seokmin speaks calmly, trying his best to calm Joshua's growing panic. He moves some hair out of Joshua's face and tucks it behind his ear.

Seokmin was just as panicked as Joshua but right now, he knew he needed to be there for Joshua. He needed to be the calm one for once to ease Joshua's growing panic. "I will have to return to Italy at some point."

Joshua tenses up at the confirmation. He feels a coldness run through him. He didn't know how, when or why he was so attached to Seokmin but the reasons didn't matter.

Maybe it was because he just felt a sense of security he's never felt before. Maybe it was because Seokmin was so possessive it made it impossible for Joshua to not have feelings for him.

Or maybe it was because the two of them had a legitimate connection that made their feelings inevitable. Whatever the reason, it had happened and now Joshua wasn't sure what he would feel when Seokmin leaves him. He was terrified to find out.

Joshua breathes heavily at the words. Seokmin is speaking quickly though, desperate to ease Joshua's panic.

"Joshua." Seokmin says as he firmly grasps the back of Joshua's neck, his other hand still grasping his hand securely. "I can conduct some of my business remotely from Boston. But yes, I will have to return to Italy."

Joshua nods, fighting back the tears. He knows Seokmin will have to go, he just hadn't known how hard that realization would be.

Seokmin both loved and hated this. He loved how Joshua needed him. How he was finally able to accept Seokmin's love and protection and now didn't want to be away from him. He hated it though because he loathed seeing Joshua like this. He only ever wanted Joshua to be happy. He never wanted the smile to leave his face.

"However." Seokmin says with reassurance. Joshua perks up slightly, hung on Seokmin's every word with hope.

"There is nothing in this world that could keep me away from you, Joshua. I will destroy anything that gets in between us. I love you. And even though we will have to be separated again, it will not last long at all. I can't stay away from you. Not now, not ever. So yes, I will go back to Italy but I will quickly find my way back to your side. Don't fret, il mio piccolo. Don't be sad. You're mine now. And our distance will only be brief. Okay?"

Joshua nods as he does everything he can to not let the tears slip out. He still dreaded the fact that Seokmin will have to leave him, but Seokmin's words of reassurance brought him comfort.

"Seokmin." Joshua says as he takes a deep breath. "Yes, my love." "It took me a long time, too long, but I was finally able to push away the trauma from my past and accept that you not only do you like me, but I like you as well."

Seokmin's chest still burned with love and desire at hearing Joshua say he liked him. He doesn't think he would ever get used to it.

"But... why?" Joshua says with uncertainty laced in his voice. Seokmin looks confused, "Why what?" "Why do you love me? You said it happened from the moment you saw me. How is that possible?"