Mi Appartieni

Chapter Twenty-Nine

         The following chapter contains explicit sexual activity. Reader discretion is advised. 

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       The only place that was open at this time of night was a convenient store. Joshua and Jeonghan got a few beers and walked together as they talked about the proposal, engagement plans and eventual wedding.

"We're thinking next winter." Jeonghan tells him, the smile never leaving his face, "Seungcheol mentioned Fairmont Copley Plaza." "Oh that'll be beautiful." "It will. I mentioned doing a small wedding by the water because I felt bad having Seungcheol spend so much money on one day." 

"How did that go?" Joshua snorts, knowing Seungcheol hated it when Jeonghan worried about him spending money on him.

Jeonghan laughs too, "He was quick to shut me up with those worries. He said he wanted the day to be as perfect and beautiful as I am." "Ugh." Joshua fake gags making Jeonghan push him playfully. The two chuckle softly together for a moment.

Joshua cautiously looks over his shoulder. He sees his two new bodyguards following at a distance, trying their best to stay hidden from Jeonghan. Joshua can't help but smile ever so slightly. The bodyguards were a reminder of Seokmin. Seokmin who was waiting for him back in his apartment.

Jeonghan sighs just then. Joshua's attention is brought back to him. Jeonghan still looked happy but now there was an unmistakable sadness to his expression. 

"Hannie? What's wrong?" "Shua," Jeonghan says sadly, "I deserve all of this, right? Seungcheol could have anyone in the world. I sometimes feel like I'm not enough for him." Joshua stops their walk with a firm hand on Jeonghan's forearm. 

"Hannie, no one is more deserving of Seungcheol's love than you. And no one is more deserving of your love than Seungcheol. If anything, you're too good for him. You loved him before his money and power and even now you're constantly telling him not to do so much for you. You're a good person, Jeonghan, you deserve every good thing in this world. Never doubt yourself like that. Especially not with Cheol. Because you two were meant to be together. Always."

The tears that threatened to overcome Jeonghan were quickly pushed away. "Wah. I've never seen you so serious before. You even called me Jeonghan." Joshua and Jeonghan chuckle lightly, trying to break the tension. 

"You've pulled me out of dark places before, I don't want to watch you do the same to yourself." Jeonghan nods with a soft smile.

The two begin walking again, the air much lighter now. Jeonghan's curiosity gets the better of him. He had a strange feeling that Joshua was acting weird and now that there was a lull in the conversation of the engagement, he found it a perfect time to ask.

"Shua." Jeonghan says softly making Joshua look up at him in curiosity. Jeonghan hesitates ever so slightly. He exhales deeply, trying to find his words. "Shua, we've known each other almost our whole lives. I know everything about you. I can see right through you." 

Joshua looks concerned and scared. Oh no. Had Jeonghan seen Seokmin back at his apartment?

"I know when you're hiding something from me. And you have been since you got back from Italy. I tried to give you time to tell me yourself, but I'm just too worried about you. I know I can be overprotective toward you and crazy at times but it's only because I love you. You're my best friend. I want to be someone you can come to for anything. I don't want you to be afraid to talk to me. Whatever it is, I'll do my best to understand. As long as you're happy and safe that's all that matters."

Jeonghan's words sit heavily on Joshua's chest. He knows Jeonghan knows there's something more that Joshua isn't telling him. But he doesn't know the extent of it. Joshua wants to tell him. He wants more than anything to tell him. But it wasn't the right time. Not yet.