Inivisible string: A Sam and Nehemia story

Chapter 24

Aelin

All she knew was that she wanted this council to be over. She was friends with most of the royals in this room, they had fought a war together, but the others were wary of her. She knew why. She had shown everyone what happened when they threatened her family, her court, her people and her lands. She showed everyone what the Fire Breathing Bitch Queen was capable of. Also, she still held control of Melisande. But that was only because the former Queen allied with Erawan, she was looking for it.

Besides, she just hadn't found anyone worthy to lead Melisande. What if she just let the throne go and the person who got on it tried to declare war on Terrassen? She couldn't handle another war, her people shouldn't pay for her mistakes. She wouldn't let them, she wouldn't leave them on their own again, even if she had to fight the war alone.

She knew deep down that she couldn't keep control of Melisande forever, that she should just let them decide who should lead them, just like she was trying to do with her kingdom. It was too much effort on her part to keep Melisande, but every time she was about to make the decision to free them, something stopped her. A few years ago, she would have said it was the gods, but she knew now they wouldn't have done anything for her or for anyone else, they would have sacrificed this world to get back to their own. Sometimes she felt sorry for them, so long away from home, but on the other hand? She knew they were on the wrong, they wanted to sacrifice her not to save Erilea, but to leave. She would always remember those last moments, when she bargained for Elena's life, only for Deanna to destroy her. She remembered seeing Mala, the only one she appreciated, the one that heard Rowan's prayers. She felt sorry for what she had done, until Mala gave her that look, and she let go.

She hadn't realized how deep inside her thoughts she was until Rowan discretely poked at her arm and said in a whisper she barely heard even with her fae hearing "Pay attention, Princess".

She had hated that nickname at first, but now she loved it, it made her feel closer to her mate. She payed attention to the meeting exactly at the right time, since the representative of the Council of Merchants of Fenharrow asked her once more about Melisande. "The war has been over for a year already Aelin, when are the people of Melisande going to have their freedom?" She hated how he used her name so casually, she wanted to rip his tongue out, but somehow she managed to control herself. "Whenever I feel like it, you will find out, meanwhile be patient, I'm still taking back control of my kingdom, after that is done I will make sure Meliasande is once again independent and not under Terrassen's rule." While that answer didn't seem enough for the Lord, she could see the King of Ellywe and Dorian, Manon and Ansel and even Rolfe were pretending to not have heard or not care about the answer. She had had this conversation with Dorian and Manon just this morning, they had asked her this same question, adn she had answered with the truth, she didn't know what to do yet. They, as always, supported her in her decisions when she told them. She didn't expect any less now. They had known each other long enough to know that when one of them said they didn't know what to do, they really didn't know and were just looking for the answer.

After that, the rest of the meeting went without a hitch, they talked about establishing trade routes, immigrants, more jobs, making sure there were no people living in the streets, that children were treated correctly, that magic wasn't abused. At the end of the meeting, Aelin, Ansel and Manon left together talking about something or other while Rowan turned into a hawk and went for a flight. He always did that after every official meeting, it was his way of relaxing. They were almost at the corner when Lysandra appeared. It wasn't unusual for some leaders to travel with some of their court, but usually Aelin was the one who traveled with the most people, Rowan always, and Lysandra and Aedion sometimes, even Fenrys, Elide and Lorcan came sometimes, Ren hated Rifthold and Vaughan was still traveling the world.

"We need to talk, it's important." Lysandra asked as soon as she was close.

"Do I wanna know right now?" Aelin answered with a tried tone. This meeting had lasted four hours. Four hours of talking about the same things with people whose kingdoms don't have enough money yet to do anything about all those things. Except maybe the trade routes, everyone wanted to be part of them, everyone wanted to make sure their kingdom got enough money to prosper and that seemed like the easiest way.

"Let's go to your chambers, I'll explain it all there, in private." Aelin didn't know what was that important, but she trusted everyone in her court to know it was something important. When they got to her rooms she could smell two people, one male and one female. Their smells seemed familiar, but she couldn't place them, and they were human too. When Lysandra opened the door Aelin was flabbergasted, her whole body stopped moving. She couldn't tell if it was real or not, If she was dead or aomething. But she had been dead and while she remembered seeing both Sam and Nehemia there, she couldn't stop seeing them right here, sitting at her table, nervous and holding each others hands.

She didn't know if she was happy about them being here ot not. Of course she was happy, but at the same time, she couldn't think. It was as if her mind was full of white noise. She loved them both, but she thought them dead, she had seen their dead mangled bodies. She thought she had recognized them both, she had even hugged Sam's body for hours. Nehemia she had barely seen, she had been too full of rage and betrayal too see too much. She had also visited both their graves, left stones for them. Cried for them.

In a way she wasn't too happy, their deaths -supposed deaths- had shaped her, had almost been broken because of them. She went to Endovier for Sam, she wento to Endovier because she thought he was death. That white noise she had inside was slowly turning into rage, red hot rage. She had almost died in Endovier and even though she didn't have the scars from her time there anymore, she still felt them deep down. And even without them, she had her tattoos.

She knew both their deaths had gotten her where she was. She knew she wouldn't have been able to defeat Meave or Erawan or even the gods without their supposed deaths. It didn't take away all the hurt they gave her. She didn't know if she could forgive them or not. She wouldn't have felt her knees give out had Aedion not stepped up to catch her. She couldn't think between all that rage and all that disbelief. She tasted the smoke on her mouth, she didn't know if it was because she was letting the fire go or because she wanted to keep it inside.

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Damn, hope I didn't fall short with this chapter. Loved writing from Aelin's POV but at the very same time it was a bit different since the books are mostly her pov so there's already a tone to her. Hope you like it. :)