Baku Takes On Beacon Remastered (Game of the Year Edition)

Buffoon Academy [V2]

Once again, we find our four main bullshitters in the mess hall in between class periods, having gotten their plate of food-- once again, Baku had ordered straight gluten and nothing else-- before joining Teams RWBY and JNPR.

Despite rarely ever hanging out outside of classes and the fact that they only kinda tolerated the four bullshitters, and vice versa, them sitting together during lunch had become a habit.

Not one that either of the teams of actually aspiring huntsman and huntresses looked forward to, but not one they cared to break either. Though, even though they were more acquaintances than friends, Ruby greeted them cheerily. More to be nice than anything.

Ruby: Hey, guys! How are you doing?

Baku: You acting real federal with all these questions

Ruby:...But I only asked one question...

Lil Broomstick: Imma gonna keep it 💯 I'm getting kinda disillustrated with this school shit

Baku: Mf you need it more than any of us

Lil Broomstick: I don't need a degree to be a SoundCloud rapper bruh

Tobi: Quit following your dreams

Baku: You damn half-wit. I'm talking about knowledge

Lil Broomstick: Wtf is that

Baku: Exactly

While they bickered like they always did, the blonde-headed leader of JNPR noticed that one of his teammates seemed quieter than usual, prompting concern.

Jaune: Pyrrha? Are you alright?

Pyrrha: Yeah, I just can't stop thinking about the other day when I was sparring with that Mercury guy. He just...forfeited. He wasn't even getting beat that bad!

Bank Bill: He quit mid-game?

Pyrrha: Yes!

Bank Bill: He think he Antonio Brown

Ren: Well, why does it trouble you?

Nora: Yeah! You woulda beat him even if he didn't quit.

Pyrrha: That's not it, it was just so strange to me. I haven't been able to shake the feeling that there's something more there.

Lil Broomstick: No offense, but you're probably just hyperventilating this whole situation

Baku: Fuck he say?

Ren:...Hyperventilating...?

Bank Bill: He needs a thesaurus

Lil Broomstick: Dinosaurs are extinct idiot

Pyrrha: Can you get back to what you were saying?

Lil Broomstick: Yeah yknow how people overthink and shit?

Pyrrha:...Yes?

Lil Broomstick: That's you

Tobi: Do not listen to a word he says, there's a monkey banging cymbals together where his brain is supposed to be

Lil Broomstick: Nah I even got a personal antidote for this

Tobi: Anecdote

Lil Broomstick: This one time I got a DM from by biggest fan and I answered it and he wanted my address and shit so he could send me fan mail. I was kinda stressing thinking they were setting me up or sumn but I gave it to him and ended up getting some cool shit kna mean?

Yang: Is that a true story?

Lil Broomstick: Yeah!

Baku: No the hell it ain't

Lil Broomstick: Wym bro

Baku: First of all that was my house that you weren't paying rent at you sluggard.

Lil Broomstick: Sluggard?

Baku: And second, that lil package sent my crib into the mf stratosphere

Lil Broomstick: Oh yeah that's what happened!

Blake: Wait, what happened?

Baku: I got express delivered a pipe bomb to my front door

Teams JNPR + RWBY: What?!

Bank Bill: Oh yeah I did that shit

Weiss: Wha- you did that?!

Baku: He Oppenheimer'd my house dawg

Blake: Well, why?!

Bank Bill: I was dunking on him in the quote retweets

Lil Broomstick: Thought he was my #1 fan but he was really my #1 opp

Baku: Stfu

Lil Broomstick: Anyways the point is...damn I forgot what I was saying

Considering how this conversation had gone and served to only confirm her fears, Pyrrha planted her face into the table in frustration.

Pyrrha: This talk hasn't helped at all...

Jaune: Aw, c'mon, Pyrrha! I'm sure it was nothing. That guy is one of the visitors for the Vytal Festival, maybe it's part of some sort of custom they have at...wherever he's from?

This seemed to actually get through to the redhead, slowly but eventually lifting her head up, lips curling into a small smile. She wasn't completely convinced, but their team leader had a knack for making her feel better.

Pyrrha: Yeah, I guess that could be it.

Nora: Hey, maybe another food fight would cheer you up!

Nora's voice was laced with a playful mischeviousness, and it got a little laugh from her teammate. It also got a response from the bullshitters as well.

Baku: Food fight?

Ruby: Yeah, it was so fun!

Baku: Oh hell nah this ain't Beacon Academy this is Buffoon Academy

Tobi: Blockhead Academy

Bank Bill: Bonehead Academy

Lil Broomstick: I can't think of one rn

Nora: Hey!

Yang: I'll have you know we had a lot of fun!

Baku: Babies think jingling keys is fun, that don't mean nayfin

Narrowing her eyes, Nora picked up her bowl of mashed potatoes and launched it at Baku's face in one swift motion, the table falling silent afterwards, waiting for his response.

Baku: You lucky that didn't get on my Yeezy Season 2 jacket I woulda fucked this whole graduating class up

Rather underwhelmingly, Baku's response only consisted of him getting up and leaving the table, prompting a previously excited Nora to slump her shoulders.

Nora: Awww, why didn't he fight back?

Bank Bill: He's not built for it

Lil Broomstick: Built for what I kinda zoned out

Bank Bill: See that's why your funds are insufficient, mf can't focus

Lil Broomstick: Listen bruh I can't keep track of everything, my minds getting put to work

Bank Bill: Your mind is a work in progress

Tobi: That shit got abandoned during construction

Jaune: Anyways what did you guys think of our dance-?

Suddenly, with a SPLAT!, a heap of mashed potatoes landed on Nora, burying her in the sustenance. Unsure how to react, Teams J(N)PR and RWBY slowly glanced near the entrance of the Mess Hall, where Baku was standing, next to a recently fired catapult.

Baku: Mf was acting reckless I had to pull out the thingamabob