HLENGIWE MABUYAKHULU
I have been in this room since Melisizwe left. I couldn’t sit downstairs with Zama and Nozizwe. Not after Zama straight up told me that her family is going to fall apart and it will all be my fault. She said a lot of hurtful things to me. She even called me a gold digger and swore, a lot. It’s true you never truly know a person until you piss them off and see their reactions. Zama is one rude girl and she doesn’t care how you receive her words. She will trash you until you surrender. If she is like that, then I know how much worse her mother is like because she didn’t get that rude persona from her father.
When I came back to Melisizwe’s bedroom, I cleaned it up. Then my stress levels went high due to overthinking and I kept pacing up and down. That led to my ankle acting up and it kind of locked. The pain was so intense, I just sat down on the floor. I couldn’t even get my pain meds because the pain was intense. I have been on this floor for few hours. My ankle is swollen and really painful. Whatever tears I might have shed dried up ages ago. At some point, I dozed off but the pain woke me up. I hear a car driving in and a few moments later, I hear shouts from the lounge. I can clearly make out what they are saying because they are not discreet. When I hear that Mbulelo is at the hospital, my heart immediately goes out to him. I didn’t know that following my heart could lead to this much pain. I didn’t want anything bad to happen to him. I knew he wasn’t going to be happy about these news, but this is something I couldn’t have predicted. I can hear the pain from Zama and I truly understand where she is coming from. I am also a sister. If something like this were to happen to my brother, my hate for my sperm donor would be infinity times infinity.
After some time, the door opens and Melisizwe walks in. He locks the door after him, something he should have done at the first place but it is too late now. He takes a deep breath and looks around the room. His eyes land on me sitting by the bathroom door and he frowns.
“Ntokazi, why are you sitting on the floor?” he asks as he walks towards me and sits next to me.
“I am not important. What happened to Mbulelo? Did he really get into an accident?” he tells me the story of how everything happened and my heart skips a beat. I may have a relationship with him, but Mbulelo was once my knight in shining armour and he is now my step-son. I care about him and the fact that my actions led to him almost losing his life breaks my heart. I try to sniff away my tears but Melisizwe wraps his arm around me.
“Baby, you don’t have to feel bad about empathising with this situation. It is shitty and everyone is going to blame us. You are a human. You are allowed to care for him.”
I wipe away my tears. “You don’t know how many times I wished he didn’t find out like this about us. This was a surprise to everyone and the fact that the end result was him getting injured instead of one of us is very shitty. Everyone is going to hold us accountable and I need one thing from you, Mnguni.”
“Anything, sthandwa sami.”
“We are in the wrong here. I am not saying let people walk all over you, but please don’t try to be defensive about this situation. You don’t owe anyone an explanation except for your kids and I need you to try and put yourself in their shoes. If roles were reversed, think about how you would have reacted and how you wished the guilty party would react. Sure, you are the parent but right now you are the number 1 enemy, together with me. Don’t fight with the kids. Please. Just be there and try to make them see from your point of view but don’t force them. Also, she is still in shock about everything. You have to explain our relationship to her. Tell her how it all started. Apologize for that scene she saw earlier on. Apologize for shouting at her. Forget about being a black father and just be her friend. You betrayed her and you need to show remorse, not a firm hand. That’s how most African parent-child relationships die. Parents never wanna admit when they are in the wrong and they never apologize. Be the exception, Mnguni. Can you do that for me?”
He nods a couple of times and exhales loudly. “Thank you for this, ntokazi. I think I might have been harsh towards Zama downstairs. But I will fix things tomorrow morning.”
I shake my head. “Not tomorrow morning. She is still awake. Go now and fix things. She is down the hall and not in another town. Never allow your child to go to bed angry at you because she will carry that anger through her dreams and wake up with it multiplied tomorrow morning.” He looks at me and I stare at him back. “Or else you are not getting some or any cuddles tonight.”
He chuckles. “Hhaybo sisi. Ngath you were better as my woman. This stepmother role is going to break us apart.”
“Unamanga because it will bring us closer. Now go. You will find me here waiting to cuddle you.”
He smiles and then stands up. “I love you kodwa ntokazi.” That warms my heart. No matter what happens, I know this man loves me dearly. Right now, I might be in pain, but the kids are a priority. He loves his children to bits and I don’t want their relationship to end because of me.
××
MELISIZWE MZIMELA
Hlengiwe always proves just how mature she is for her age. She is very wise and I am glad I have her in my life. Whatever we go through, I will make sure that I never let her slip right through my fingers. In life, we only have one soulmate and I have found mine. I am not letting go. I head to Zama’s room and I knock a few times before letting myself in. She is lying on the bed and has on headphones. I can see that she is crying and I instantly feel bad. My children are my life and I never want them to be sad about anything. The fact that she is crying because of something I did, that breaks my heart into a thousand pieces. I walk closer to her bed and softly pat her leg. She jumps up startled and she exhales in relief when she sees me.
“You scared me.” She takes off the headsets and wipes her tears. “What do you want baba?” she doesn’t beat around the bush and I swallow hard.
“I am sorry, my child. I am sorry that you walked in on Hlengiwe and I doing that. I am sure you got traumatized. That is not something you should see your father doing.”
“Did she put you up to this?” she asks and I already know who she is referring to.
“Perks of dating someone who understand feelings of the youth. And please, don’t ever reduce her to my sex partner. You are my child. I don’t ever want to hear you talk like that about any woman, especially someone I hold dear to my heart. I know you have a lot of questions about Hlengiwe and I. and the situation with Mbulelo didn’t make things easier but everything is going to be alright, mtanami. A mess has already been created. A bomb has exploded and it has left huge damage. What I need from you right now is to put this to bed for a while and we will talk about it after Mbulelo gets better. Can you do that for me?”
She sniffs and nods. “Yes, I can do that.”
“What I need you to know is that Hlengiwe is here to stay. She is a huge part of my life and I hope she can be a huge part of your life too as time goes by. I love you. I love all my kids and I would do anything for them but I also love Hlengiwe. Can you please not fight with her while she is here?” she nods. “I love you, sthandwa sami. And I am man enough to realize my mistakes. Tomorrow morning we are going to visit your brother, okay?”
She smiles. “I would love that very much.” Her smile warms my heart even though it is not directed to me. I kiss her forehead and wish her a good night. “I might have done something but you will see tomorrow.” Her words don’t sit well with me but I don’t pry. “And I am sorry for disrespecting you.” I smile at her. I am glad she apologized.
I walk back to my room feeling a bit at ease. I don’t want my relationship with Hlengiwe to break my bond with my kids. When I walk back into my room, I find Hlengiwe still sitting on the floor with her eyes shut.
“Baby, why aren’t you in bed?” I ask.
She smiles but it almost seems fake. She then points at her legs and I see it. Something I didn’t see earlier on. Her ankle is swollen. Fuck. Now I feel like a douchebag for not having noticed this before. I acted like an arrogant jerk who prioritizes himself and not other people.
“What happened?” I enquire as I go to her and pick her up from the floor. She moans painfully and I slow my movements.
“I don’t know but it happened a few hours after you left.” She responds softly.
“I am so sorry for not noticing earlier and for coming back so late. I feel so terrible, my love.” I walk with her to the bathroom and put her on the bench there. I then take a basin from the cabinet and fill it with warm water. I quickly dash to the kitchen to grab salt and head back to my room. I soak her ankle on the warm water with salt. After a few minutes, I massage her ankle and then rub it with some ointment. She falls asleep before I can even carry her to bed. This makes me feel like an asshole. I should have noticed something was wrong the moment I stepped inside my room.
YOU ARE READING
Unhinged Love
Romansa"I have never felt love like this before. So wrong yet feels so damn good. I must be going insane. That's the only explanation." Hlengiwe is a cool calm and collected lady but her world is about to be turned upside down when a man crushes into her l...
