A Long Hard Fought Journey (Completed)

Chapter 19:Leaving AgainDyingand Returning To Life

I have the bag packed up with things we may need and clothes,I'm ready,we need to go now to get her to the hospital before she slips away any farther,she said.I'll carry her if you can get the small oxygen tank and the bag and I will sit the fluids on her abdomen to carry it,he said to her.Okay,she said. As he was getting me ready,Alexis called Nic's grandma who was on her way,Alexis then ran and quickly told Nic,"your grandma is coming quickly and will be here soon to pick you up,your dad will come to get you when he can,we will see you sometime soon". Luckily Nic wasn't curious about what was happening.Bye,mommy, love you,he said while hugging her and I could tell that although I was unconscious she was trying to hold back tears. Okay,I've got to go,she said. She ran back to us and grabbed the bag. Joseph picked me up bridal style with the fluids sitting in my abdomen for him to carry me and it. Alexis grabbed the small little oxygen tank. They walked/ran out to the car. Alexis laid the seat down in the Pilot.The trunk was open and so Joseph laid me down flat,softly into a comfortable position covered with the blanket laying on a sheet with a pillow under my head but quickly.He climbed in next to me and grabbed the bag and oxygen tank from Alexis,sitting the oxygen and fluids next to my side.I had a fever and so he had a damp,cold,wet washcloth,holding it onto my forehead.I was still unconscious and unresponsive but I soon felt a blinding pain and felt myself sliding in the blackness back towards consciousness. I gasped as I opened my eyes,trying to breathe. Iz,can you hear me,he asked.I moved my hand to give him an answer which was yes. My hand felt weak which had the brace on it,well,my whole body felt weak.I used my hand to move the oxygen mask.I was very confused and disoriented when I came to.Joseph I am so sorry,I was going to say more but I couldn't breathe and was struggling and he cut me off in saying,"it's okay save it try to breathe". But what happened,I asked very confused. Don't worry,he said and that was all he said and he was trying not to cry.I placed the mask back into place,taking deep breaths from it breathing heavily.I started shaking since I was kinda cold although I had a blanket wrapped over me. Next came the nightmare daydream. My eyes grew wide and this time I shook harder but not from being cold.He went to pull the blanket up just before my eyes rolled back into my head and I lost consciousness again. Izzie,please stay with me,I love you,he said before he started crying. He covered me up with another blanket trying to keep me warm,placed a pillow under my head to prop me up trying to help me get air to my lungs,and checked my pulse.I knew if we didn't get to wherever we were going then I was going to die,I could tell that I was dying.My pulse was really weak,that I hardly had one that could be detected.He scooted over and laid next to me,pulling me close to his chest,holding me tight. We were almost there,and Alexis was driving as fast as she possible could hoping that we wouldn't get pulled over. I felt myself shift farther into the darkness.Everything was black and I couldn't feel but I could hear.He kept the oxygen mask on me,trying not to disturb it as he was holding me.When I gained consciousness again I was in the back of the Pilot in his arms as we were pulling into the hospital. Doctors ran over with a gurney and supplies just as soon as Alexis parked. They opened the back and Joseph moved me onto the gurney not noticing that I was awake,confused,and terrified.They worked quickly and I tried to move my hand to move the mask but I couldn't so I just said Joseph as loud as I could and they were informing the doctors and he heard me. Oh,god,Izzie,I thought I lost you,he said.Don't worry,I'm here and I am not going to leave,he said.I lost consciousness and the doctors freaked out and started running me again into the OR. They took me for a few scans and on the last one my heart stopped.They revived me and ran a few tests.Joseph had on scrubs and sat by my head the whole time not leaving me just like he said.It was an infection along with acute bronchitis and a late stage of pneumonia. It was making it hard for me to breathe mostly because my lungs were filling up with fluid way to fast and they weren't sure if I was gonna survive it or the surgery but they had to try cause without the surgery I was going to die.I wasn't in my body since I was in a medically induced coma this time and was going to wake up very soon. I was hoping that I could live.We were sitting beside my lifeless body in the ICU. A few moments later,I was fading away,slipping into black. A minute later,I gasped as I took in a few deep breath still able to breathe on my own but not without assistance from oxygen.I opened my eyes,blinking several times.Joseph,I said weakly since I could now talk with Nubbins instead of having to move the mask to talk. Oh,dear,god,Izzie, you're awake,thank,god,he said.I had the mask back in place but moved it again to say,"yes,I'm back,I'm awake,don't leave me I need you,you are my strength and the thing keeping me alive,and no matter what fight to bring me back if I die,I said. What did they say was wrong,I asked taking deep breaths from the oxygen to breathe.I will tell you but you're back,you're back,and you remember,he said. I moved the mask and said,"I can remember,I remember".He sat on the edge of the bed,leaned over,and we hugged tightly. Oh,god,your back Iz you're back,he said.I then saw nothing but darkness and my body went limp as my hand soon fell off of his back. I woke outside my body. Izzie,Iz,he said as a question shaking me slightly.Izzie,Izzie stay with me,Mom,he yelled. The heart monitor flatlined as it couldn't detect my heartbeat and a alarm went off.Izzie,Izzie,he questioned shaking me with him still holding me before placing me down flat on the bed. My team of doctors,nurses,and Alexis ran in. Alexis started chest compressions. Joseph had moved out of their way so they could do their job of saving my life.He was sitting,leaning against the wall crying. They had an oxygen mask on me for now.Get me a crash cart,Kate yelled trying to help Alexis.They brought one in and Kate took over compressions while Alexis placed something on my back and chest. One of the other nurses said,give me a intubation tray.She took the oxygen mask off and gave it to someone else who turned it off. She's crashing we have to hurry or she is going to be dead,Kate yelled trying to get help and get the crash cart set up.The nurse took the bag thing and placed it over the lower half of my face.She pumped it once. She would do so every 2 seconds.Alexis said,"charge to 120,clear". She took these 2 black flat things that had handles and placed them on my chest. They shocked me and my body bounced up and I faded and felt myself gaining consciousness and losing it again. She said,"charge 300,clear".The same thing again but this time my heart started beating and I opened my eyes gasping. Kate placed the oxygen nubbins back on me turned on.I had regained consciousness waking to excruciating pain. As soon as they noticed that I was conscious and that I was stable,they left the room all except for Kate,Alexis,and Joseph.Joseph was now sitting on the edge of my bed next to me,crying.Alexis adjusted the machines and such things connected to me and slid some medications into me through the IV.She sat across from Joseph in a chair and then she started crying.She held my right hand not disturbing the IV while Joseph held onto me.Kate went out to work so Alexis could have some time with us.They had taken the wrist brace off for now. Joseph stroked my hair soothingly and I soon fell asleep slowly.Alexis had stroked my hand and seeing me asleep once they stopped crying,they went out into the hallways.Joseph I am sorry to say but we just barely revived her she almost died and she's weak,her lungs aren't filling up with fluid as fast but it still is and until she gets better and the antibiotics kick in,it is going to make her gasp for air since she can't breathe,we have her medicated as much as we can for her comfort to distant her from the pain and the antibiotics to try to help her fight the sicknesses but it isn't helping the fluid in her lungs and she is struggling,I know she just got her memory but we don't think she is going to make it this time and so Joseph I think that it may be time to say goodbye and let her go,we just don't think that she will survive the surgery to remove the fluid and she can't live with it and there is a chance that she may die on that table,she said.Joseph came back in and since Alexis moved the bed railing down for him,he laid down on his side next to me,pulling me close with the blanket pulled up over me,and I snuggled into his chest.I love you,you are strong,fight for me you are a fighter you can do this,but please don't try to leave me,I can't live without you,you are going to be my forever,forever always,he told me quietly.He kissed my forehead and laid back with me in his arms and soon he too fell asleep.A few hours later,Alexis came in and woke us up. She told me what was gonna happen and the reason why they had to do it since there was fluid in my lungs and why since the pneumonia is advanced but it isn't to where they can't cure it. I asked her if Joseph could come in to the OR with me since I didn't want him to leave me. She said yes but that he had to sit down next to me silently and that he has to wash his hands,wear gloves,and surgical scrubs.She gave me meds,a sedative and then they wheeled me to the OR. They gave me anesthesia. I went to say something to Joseph but my words slurred and I fell into a deep sleep and he stayed next to me the whole time.They cut into my sides and entered small transparent tubes connected to box things. Fluid instantly flowed out into the boxes. Once it stopped,they took the tubes out and stitched the incisions closed with the dissovable stitches so that maybe I can go home in 3 days. They took me back to the ICU. Joseph she is alive for now,she said. Eventually,I woke up and ate a little bit although I was sore and half sick. I slept a lot for the next week and finally I was released. Joseph had to carry me since my crutches were at home. But I was stronger and was still a little sick and was on several medications but I am not dead so that is something. I beat the odds and I am definitely a miracle.