Alone

F I F T E E N

(a.n. TRIGGER WARNING THROUGHOUT!!)

"Molly, is that you?" Eve chirps as I slowly open the front door, hoping nobody would hear.

"Mhm" I answer, trying to hold Calum upright. "Eve, can you um.."

She walks out of the living room with a glass of wine in her hand and gasps as soon as she sees the state Calum is in.

"Oh gosh" she speaks in a bother. "Jason"

"O-oh heyyyy" Calum shouts, waving his hands around in Eve's face. I mentally face palm and force him to hold his hands down by his side. "I am Calum-um-umm"

"He's Calum if you didn't quite get that" I laugh, handing him over to Jason who holds him better than I was previously doing.

Jason and Calum begin to make conversation, leaving Eve staring at me with a cheeky look in her eye.

"That was the boy in your bed this morning" she giggles under her breath, for my ears only.

"Don't tell dad" I speak back and she just smiles goofily, causing me to do the same.

Just as Jason starts carrying Calum up the stairs and to the guest bedroom, the house phone begins to ring. We all shoot each others looks obviously thinking the same thing. Who would be calling at this time?

Eve picks up and after a few nods, she ends the call.

"Molly" she starts. "It's your friend Isabella, she's in hospital..."

My heart drops to my stomach just as everyone else's faces drop. All the thoughts that rush through my head are the worst case scenarios. I had a major fear of hospitals and I made a promise to myself that the only other time I would end up there, was if it was for my own death. And I wasn't prepared to go there tonight.

"They said we need to go to the hospital as soon as possible" Eve says sweetly, rubbing my shoulder and trying to comfort me but I couldn't hear her words. They were replaced with a ringing that wouldn't leave my head. It hurt more than the pain that was reality and I was kind of grateful for the high-pitched shriek.

The last time I heard this noise was when I sat beside Effie's dead body. That night stayed in my memory and continues to haunt me to this day. I wasn't at all prepared to relive that day with one more best friend. I couldn't relive that day. Not again.

Next thing I know, Calum's sobered up and we're sitting in the back car on the way to the hospital.

Jason and Eve are trying to get me to talk but I can't. I physically can't string together a sentence that could begin to describe the pain and guilt I was feeling inside.

I wanted to be alone. Well, not completely alone. I wanted to sit in a dark room with the only thing that caressed my skin like no human could. My blade.

I had managed to live like this for the last several years of my life. I had gotten used to the gaping hole in my heart, the emptiness of having no friends and no family. Then all at once, I gain a family and a few loving friends.

I guess it all gets too much and you take things for granted. But one day, you don't know and you'll never know when but it gets ripped from your arms, from your life and you're left alone once again.

Every day is a waiting game until that day, that day that you have been hiding from all your life. It creeps up on you. It's coming for everyone, some more than others but everyone receives this pain. Some just show it better and others tend to keep it away from people.