Sunshine

Tension

Traveling on the road with Kakashi was both hard and easy. It was mostly hard just because I was nearly in pieces, but it was also proving that we both had our limits. It was clear that we loved each other but with me being an emotional wreck and trauma still fresh, it was hard for Kakashi to remain his usual calm self.

I didn't blame him, and he didn't blame me, but it didn't make it easier. It was still there. So, we had to adjust. It was all a change.

"We just need time, Mori."

I looked up from the book I wasn't really reading. Kakashi was standing outside of the wagon, he looked thoughtful. Likely he had been listening to my thoughts again. I frowned, closing my book and letting it rest in my lap.

"I know, I just... it's a lot, everything that's happened until now." I whispered, biting my lip a little.

"You haven't had much time to just be awake, to be safe and alive." The regret was in his voice again. He looked behind him toward the sky, I could see the smoke in the sky. The smell was heavy in the air; the war was catching up to us again.

"How long my life had seemed when I was growing up alone in the time, I felt like I would be an old woman by the time I got to see you again. Now it seems like nothing is ever not happening." I sighed and my stomach grumbled again.

He looked at me knowingly. "I'm sorry, dear."

I shook my head. "I just need time to... he's in many ways. Don't be sorry, I wouldn't be here without you Kakashi." I wanted him to come hug me.

A rumbling sound filled the air, a sudden flash of lightning from overhead lit the world up. He turned ahead of us, looking around the wagon. "I need to find more grain; there is somewhere we are going but you still need to eat now. Eating meat isn't good for you either." He shook his head looking at my frail body. "It will rain soon, I'm going to pack up, do you need to use the restroom?" he asked, turning to wait for my reply.

I nodded and got up, coming to the edge of the wagon. He helped me down and while he started to clean up, I went to take care of myself. After rinsing my hands, a thought crossed my mind, something that I hadn't even noticed.  I glanced over at Kakashi as he moved like a whirlwind.

"Kakashi?" I called him.

He paused to look at me, his eyes frantic for a moment as he looked to see if I was in distress. Once he realized I wasn't about to fall over he relaxed. "Yes?" He breathed.

"I haven't had my period."

He blinked, "You had it when you woke from the first time?"

I nodded, "the last time was actually right when we went to the doctors about my shoulder."

He seemed alarmed a little. It was quite some time ago. He started to pack again but more slowly. "You're under a lot of stress and not eating enough either. It could very well be the reason." He said it after a moment. He tried to keep a calm face, but I could see the worry... the same worry in my own eyes, I'm sure.

He was right through; it wasn't like I was living a normal or peaceful life. The fear didn't dissipate. It was there now, the moment I had noticed that I hadn't gotten it. I stayed at the edge of the woods, watching him pack it all away. I knew it would be easier if I wasn't right there.

I looked down at my shaking hands. What if it was his? I swallowed and shook my head. He hadn't even...

"Mori." Kakashi's voice was stern, yet soft.

I looked up at him as rain started to fall, light for now. He looked tired, serious but also... he looked angry.

"You are not pregnant." He said it firmly.