Philophobia 2 (Yandere! Sugawara X FemReader!)

| Part: And So, The Cycle of Death Continues |

Asahi died a couple minutes later, just after he'd arrived at the hospital.

His allergic reaction was too severe. The medication the EMT had on hand wasn't enough; and even though he'd made his peanut allergy known to the kitchen prior— it was still found as an accident and no and foul-play was suspected.

I burrow my face into the palms of my hands as I remain seated outside of the hospital. I sit furthest away from the automatic doors, just a bench away from Hinata and Yachi.

Someone I knew has just died from an allergic reaction. Asahi has spent his entire life tip-toeing around food and being a picky eater— only to succumb to it years later. So why...?

"...Why... am I still thinking about that stupid kiss?"

I take a glance over to the two. They're just as quiet and still as I am, interlinking fingers in on their laps. I know this must come as a shock to them too.

I just can't shake off the guilt and Asahi's tear-filled face during his final moments. My heart feels heavy, and as I reach to clench it— I can feel the tears beginning to escape me. I can't stop its flow, and as my shoulders begin to quake— I cup my hand against my lips.

I want nothing more than to feel Hinata's embrace right now, but instead I'm holding myself. Caring about nothing else other than myself. And as I sit here, I hardly grieve Asahi. I just feel bad that he was ever fated to meet me. I am a curse.

What kind of person does this make me?

A part of me wishes that I was the one being embalmed, but instead I'm spiraling out of control. I begin to heave breaths, feeling the air leave my chest as quickly as I catch it.

Hinata looks over to me. He's finally raised his head the way alarms begins to blare in his head. "(Y/N?)" He beckons me.

But I don't pay Hinata any mind. I keep my hand on my chest, rising to my feet. Suddenly, I feel like I'll need my own hospital room.

"I can't... breathe well—! I can't..." I hush out, keeping my eyes on the concrete beneath us. I then reach to connect all five of my thumb pads against the window— uncaring about the fingerprints and marks I leave behind.

Both Hinata and Yachi run to my side, but I pull away from Yachi— making sure she notices the pain in my eyes. And as homely as Hinata's arms feel, I pull away from him too.

"Y/N..." Hinata starts, but he begins to bite his lip. He has to watch everything he says and does now. I lower my head, tears slowing.

They just don't get it. I don't deserve comfort.

I hear the windows for doors slide open and my body instinctively moves into that direction. I can hardly see or breathe; this is a chore for me.

But as I approach the doors, I am stopped by a man much taller than me. My eyes remain on feet— I'm embarrassed about a stranger seeing me this vulnerable.

And as much as it feels like I've already said it... I recognize these slacks, these dress shoes; but I don't recognize this new bandage there on his left ankle.