Kissing the Agony (Agony Series #1)

Chapter 27: Rooted in Grace

"Good morning, Teacher Rhian!" sabay-sabay na bati sa akin ng mga estudyante ko nang pumasok ako sa classroom.

"Good morning, Grade 2!" I smiled widely at them.

Ibinaba ko sa table ko ang mga gamit na dala at pati na rin ang bag ko. Pang apat na buwan ko na ito sa pagtuturo at sobrang saya ng puso ko.

The school I was hired to is just near my condo. I specifically chose it because I didn't want to deal with traffic issues. The streets in Manila are always so busy and crowded, and as much as possible, I don't want to bring that kind of stress into my classroom. Teaching already takes so much energy, I want to show up calm and focused for my students.

I have never been this happy and content with my life. I feel so fulfilled. The fact that I get to do both my passion, teaching and modeling, while earning from them is really a huge privilege for me.

I teach English to my elementary students. Wala akong advisory class, kaya part-time lang ako sa private school na pinagtatrabahuhan ko. Kaunti lang ang mga estudyante kaya hindi gano'n ka-hectic sa schedule ko. Ang pagmomodelo talaga ang mas kumakain sa oras ko dahil iyon naman talaga ang full-time job ko.

Walang linggo na hindi ako nabubook ng mga kliyente. Like what my manager and mentor said when we first met, my face is so "marketable". Not that I am complaining, I was just overwhelmed at first because I couldn't believe it, but now I am just really grateful for how my life turned out.

"For today's lesson, we'll be discussing singular and plural nouns," I said as I taped the printed material on the board—something I had prepared earlier in the faculty room.

Madali lang magturo sa mga estudyante ko dahil halos lahat sila ay mabait at magalang. Hindi ako nasstress sa pag suway dahil wala naman sa kanila 'yung sobrang likot na mga bata. Minsan nga lang ay hindi maiiwasan sa mga batang lalaki, pero kapag naman sinuway ko ay nakikinig naman agad sila.

I teach English to Grade 2, Grade 3, and Grade 5 pupils. And I must say that I really do handle kids well. I've been receiving positive feedback from parents, and the school itself applauds me for it. They say I'm a natural when it comes to children.

I have a gentle approach, especially when it comes to preventing bullying. I truly believe that kids mirror the way adults treat them. If you speak to them without respect, why would you expect them to treat you any differently?

But when you approach them with kindness, they won't be afraid to tell you how they really feel. That's why I never shout, even when they make mistakes. Anger only builds fear, and when children are afraid, they shut down. They won't open up. They won't ever trust you.

And I don't want my students to fear me.

I want them to feel safe with Teacher Rhian. I want them to be comfortable, to know they can talk to me, not run away from me. I want to be the kind of teacher who feels like a friend to them.

I make sure everyone gets involved in class. No one gets left behind. Not on my watch.

"You're so pretty, Rhian! Bagay na bagay talaga sa'yo ang designs ko!" ani Michael, ang designer ng mga gowns na isusuot ko mamaya para sa shoot ko sa Vogue.

I sat still on the make up chair while my make up artist is currently busy doing my makeup.

"Thanks, Michael. It's such an honor to wear your gowns. Your work is absolutely stunning," I said with a smile, turning to the famous designer beside me.

He looked genuinely pleased... almost shy about it, like he wasn't used to being complimented face to face.

Miss Farah was practically on cloud nine when she told me about the booking. It was another big moment for the agency since Michael was another high-profile designer client. And somehow... they chose me.

I won't lie, there's a bit of pressure. I could feel it settling in my chest the moment I stepped onto the set. But I keep telling myself to just breathe. Relax and just enjoy the shoot.

Because the last thing I want is to look stiff or tense in the photos. I want the gowns to move with me, not against me. I want to honor the story Michael poured into every stitch.

And most of all, I want to prove to myself that I belong here.

I headed straight to the shoot location right after I finished teaching. Luckily, the traffic was light, so the drive only took around thirty to forty minutes.

The makeup artist dabbed something golden across my eyelids while humming a Kundiman tune under her breath. I stared at myself. My hair slicked back into a low, regal bun, my face a canvas of bronze and warm terracotta. The look was soft but strong. Earthy, like something rooted in home.

The shoot concept was called "Hibla." Threads of the islands.

It was Vogue's tribute to Filipino craftsmanship, a spotlight on a local designer who built each gown by hand, stitching stories into every hemline. The gowns were nothing like the ones I used to dream about when I was younger. These weren't about fantasy. They were ancestral. Honest and extremely elegant in a way that whispered, not screamed. Not tacky in any sense.

One of the gowns was made of sheer piña, delicately embroidered with Sampaguita vines. Another had sleeves so structured they reminded me of church bells, bold and ceremonial. There was a red one, too, it was deep and haunting, like dusk before a storm. It wrapped around my body like it belonged to someone before me... someone fierce.

I was told we'd be shooting in an old ancestral home today. High ceilings, wooden floors, and walls lined with family portraits that probably hadn't been touched in decades.

"You're a natural, Rhian! Ganda!" The photographer showered me with praise. I chuckled and did more poses.

The shoot lasted for four hours, it's surprisingly quick, considering we did twenty layouts. Most shoots like this would stretch to at least six. But that's the thing about me, I work professionally, and I work fast. That's one of the reasons creatives enjoy working with me.

"Thank you, everyone!" I waved goodbye to the whole team. It was around 10:00 pm when the photographer wrapped up the shoot.

"Thanks, Rhian! Sa susunod ulit, ha?" si Michael. Tumango at ngumiti agad ako sa kanya dahil magandang feedback na agad iyon.

If the client wants to book you again for another shoot, it means that you did well.

We had dinner in between shoots, so I wasn't really hungry after. Though I only had a Caesar salad since I was modeling gowns, I didn't want to get too full or feel bloated on camera.

My lips parted when I arrived on my condo's doorstep. My steps became slower... and slower.

There's a bouquet on my doorstep. Pinulot ko iyon nang makarating ako sa harap ng pintuan ko. Hinanap ko agad kung may note pero wala akong nakita.

Just lilies and gypsophila wrapped in brown paper, no note, nothing.

My fingers trembled as I touched each flower. My first instinct is that this came from Cyrus. My second instinct? I am not sure.

Maraming may gustong manligaw sa akin pero wala akong pinaunlakan. Wala rin akong sinabihan ng address ng condo unit ko, tanging si Miss Farah at si Miss Mystery lang ang nakakaalam dahil sila lang naman talaga dapat. Kaya hindi ko naiiisip na mga kapwa kong modelo ang nagpadala ng mga ito.

Hindi rin pwede na mga kliyente dahil confidential ang address namin na mga model. Ang tanging alam na address ng mga kliyente ay ang address ng agency namin, hindi ng mismong condo unit ko.

Pero hindi rin naman ako sigurado na kay Cyrus galing ang mga bulaklak, dahil hindi ko naman nabanggit sa kanya ang address ko. Wala akong naaalalang gano'n.

"Kanino 'to galing?" I murmured to myself.

Nagpakawala ako ng marahas na buntong hininga bago tuluyang pumasok sa loob ng unit ko.

Alam kong mapupuyat na naman ako kakaisip kung kanino 'to galing at nasstress na agad ako.

I ran my fingers gently over the petals one last time before placing them in a vase. No note and no name, huh?

Just questions I wasn't ready to answer.

And a heart that still, somehow, knew who I was thinking of.