Heal my heart.

14

Gracie
I slipped on a floral dress and skipped down the stairs. Literally. He was leaning against the car, staring up at the sky.
"Hey." I flushed.
"You're looking lovely. Where did you get that colour in your cheeks from?" He asks.
"I just came here running, so..." I trail off and sit in the car, he was standing there holding the door open. I sat inside and shut the door behind me.
"Coffee at 8:00 pm in the night, great choice." I say.
He winks at me. "We're busy people, aren't we."
"Sure we are." I mumble.
"How are your parents?" He asks, looking straight at the road ahead.
"Why all of a sudden, this question?" I ask him.
"Oh just enquiring." He asks.
"Dad now stays at home and works from Seattle itself. Mom misses me a lot, but more than that, I crave for the comfort of her arms. Vanessa is currently working at Seattle. I've asked them to come over here at California."
"What happened to that Simon guy she used to date?"
"They broke up during senior year. They still are friends though. Relationships nowadays, I tell you."
"What's wrong with them? Time is just too fast Grace, if it doesn't work out, they go back to being friends."
"What I fail to understand is, how can you just be friends with someone you once loved?"
"They never loved each other, probably."
"Oh they did."
"Then they wouldn't have been friends now."
"Maybe. Because in a way, you really cannot be just friends. The love that rides high on you can't be limited to friendship. You can't sit and discuss the weather when you all you really wanna do is hold their face and kiss them."
"So is Vanessa dating someone new?"
"No, focusing on her career right now. She believes that it was young love, not even love, attraction."
"Young passionate love is the most reckless thing ever."
"Like our 's was."
"And we saw how it ended."
It felt like I was punched in the gut. Ouch that hurt. I just kept quiet. Sure, it was a love. You can't keep fanning dead coal expecting sparks to fly from it again. Our love affair is dug somewhere in the Earth. I'm just next to him, yet I can't have him. So close and yet so far.
We stop in front of a coffee shop. I get down to see it is completely open, like a garden area. Tables and chairs have been set up, encompassed between fences and plants. Orange lights hang around and it seems like that place we went to celebrate the new year seven years back. But only the ambience similar. Rest of it has changed, everything.
"What will you have ma'am?" The waiter asks.
"Whatever he orders."
Right from the start, the responsibility of placing orders was always on Alastair. He knew what was best in each restaurant.
"Chocolate smoothie for the lady and blueberry milkshake for me."
The waiter nods and moves away.
"So tell me about how you set up your business?" I ask, leaning forward.
His eyes gleam and he suddenly looks very alive. He starts animatedly talking about Roberts and Co. and his contribution to it. People look the best when they're talking about their passion, their love. Their eyes gleam and their demeanour changes. I listened to him intently. He was so intelligent and witty. Charismatic and driven. And ambitious. His ambition had always stood him out from others. He was destined for greater things in life. Probably the reason why I had to move away from his way. So that he could achieve his goals without any distraction. And now he's here, on the peak. That pain finally paid off. I'm happy for him. His happiness makes me smile. Break up doesn't take away the bond you share. Because you don't have to be in a relationship to be in love.
"How's your mum?" I ask.
He nonchalantly leans back and asks,"Do I look as if I care?"
"You don't look like that but well, I know you do care."
"No I don't."
"Oh yes you do."
"You're still so stubborn. About mum, she passed away two years back."
"I'm sorry." I gasp as I think about the woman I never met, but who was so crucial in our lives. He had lost so much over the years, yet he sits here so carefree about everything.
"Don't be."
I still feel as if I don't know you at all."
He raises his eyebrows at me. "You know me better than anyone else."
"You haven't changed a bit."
"Oh I have."
"As in?"
"I've started smoking. Less of soccer, more of work. Gone is my motorbike, a car is here. Pain does that to people. They change."
What sort of a change? Did he even undergo half what I had to bear?
"These are all material changes. I'm talking about your character, personality and general nature."
"Oh that won't change. My outlook and thinking have definitely changed though. You can say I'm wiser, smarter."
"I can see that."
And then he winks. The skin near his eyes wrinkles once again and the nerve in his neck twitches. There are some things of his which truly belong to him. Which are 'just Alastair' things. They suit him and he makes them look good. He's too perfect for me, too good. And these little things make me fall for him even more. The subtle, soft touches of his persona.
We talk some more. In fact, a lot. Catching up on old stuff, laughing, joking, making fun of each other. He was more like my best friend. I wish I could get him back.
The bill arrives. Alastair removes his wallet. I immediately check my cost and keep the cash on the table.
"Gracie I'm paying."
"No I paid for me."
"But I brought you here. I am paying."
"Alastair. I'm not that kind of a girl. I'm paying. I don't have a habit of letting people pay for me."
His eyes darkened. "Then inculcate that habit."
And he briskly paid the waiter. My money lay still on the table. We got up and sat on the bike.
"Thank you." I huff.
"You don't need to thank me for anything. Ever. Remember that." I smile at that line. True. We don't need to apologize or feel grateful. We're like that. Alastair and Gracie.

Alastair
We reach her apartment. All throughout the ride, we talked. Conversation flowed like water. As she got down from the bike in front of her impressive apartment, see turned around. Her hair was still wet, considering she rushed straight from the shower to me. It looked sexy.
"Thank you Alastair. I had a great time today." She says.
"I did too."
I was about to say how much I liked spending time with her when a guy came out from a car at a distance. He hopped over to Grace and hugged her. My palms twitched. He kissed her on the cheek and Grace too looked surprised. But she reciprocated.
"Gracie I missed you." The wierdo said, not looking at me, but aware of my presence.
"Goodbye Alastair." Gracie waved apologetically at me and turned around. The asshole smirked at me as he kept a hand on her waist and led her away. I wanted to smack him, but I was numb.
"Who was he?" I ask the receptionist.
"Don't you know Sir? That was Ben Jameson, Ms. Hyde's boyfriend."