Insomnia (Mass Effect)

Chapter 1

A/N Hey! This story was also on Fanfiction.net... But I really enjoy it and think it really shows my writing abilities. It's a Shrios... and it's kind of long. Not sure if I want to update or not... I kind of don't want to ruin it. If you would like me to, then you will have to comment and tell me. Please vote/comment/add... Let me know what you think, I like it and think it's quite beautiful and very set apart from my more funny stuff. I love you all! Please enjoy :) Also I do not own Mass Effect... All rights to Bioware!

Shepard lays in her bed silently. The quiet hum of the Normandy filling her thoughts. Thane lay asleep besides her. She looks at him for a moment and a small grin appears on her, usually stern, face. He looks so peaceful when he was asleep, like all the worlds problems disappeared. Shepard couldn't help but wonder what their future would hold. Thane, was a dying man, however. Shepard avoids the thought, and looks away from him before she bursts into tears. Thane never liked it when Shepard mourned him before he was dead.

Shepard turns back over and stares at her wall and nightstand absently. She keeps a picture of Thane by her bed. She studies it. He was smiling, holding her close to him. She smiles and then looks up at her ceiling as she lets out a long sigh. She then closes her eyes, but she can't find sleep. She finds herself looking back at Thane. She loves him so much, but she just doesn't know if he'll ever know. She absently strokes his face. He doesn't twitch. His stomach rises and falls ever so quietly. Shepard inches forward, tempted to set her head on his chest. But she resists, for a moment.

She takes in the scene. She doesn't know how much longer her or Thane will be alive. She wants to remember this scene. She almost becomes jealous of how Drells can memorize pieces of their past with perfect clarity, but then quickly changes her mind when she thinks about Saren, Sovereign, and the Collectors. Shepard studies everything, hoping she will remember this scene. She gently lays her head on his chest, and sets his arm around her. She can hear his heart beat, and feel him breathe. It sounds so calm, making her forget about all of her responsibilities.

Shepard closes her eyes for a moment, and then breaks out in silent tears. She doesn't know why she's crying exactly, but it's for a jumble of things. She cries for Thane, the dying Drell in her bed, she cries for all of her fallen friends, she cries because of the huge amount of people depending on her. Shepard regrets having thoughts about just disappearing, or just backing out. She wipes the tears from her eyes and steadies her breath. Oh how she desperately wants to live in this moment for the rest of her life.

The clock reads 1:18. Shepard hasn't slept in weeks. She hopes Thane doesn't find out, or he will make her. She doesn't want to plunge right back into the horrible nightmares that plauge her sleep. Shepard becomes sleepy while laying with Thane. She wants nothing more than to let her eyes close, but she can't. She won't. She stares at Thane's green skin, carefully looking at each scale and the details. She runs her finger down the middle of his chest, feeling his soft, smooth, scaly, skin. She breathes his scent in and stares at her blank wall.

Time seems to have stopped. Shepard almost gets up, out of bed. But she stops herself. She wants to lay here, but at the same time she could use a shower. Shepard gets up quickly and quietly, watching Thane as she gets up, hoping not to disturb him. She succeeds, and slips into her bathroom.

She peels off her sweat soaked Cerberus top and throws it into the corner. She undoes her belt and takes off her boots. Her feet are sticky and sweaty, along with the rest of her body. She takes her pants off and throws them in the corner along with the shirt. Finally she unhooks her bra, and takes off her underwear. She seems a lot cooler now. Shepard turns on the hot water and lets it pour down her face and body. She's to tired to actually wash herself, but the water feels nice.