I Will Wait...(A Harry Styles Fanfic)

Chapter 18

*****

Tears spring to my eyes just thinking about it. You were so weak and sad. I know you tried to hold on. You fought so hard but you’re body just couldn’t do it.

So as the infection got worse, so did everything else. Louis was so torn up because he couldn’t make it. Mum was a wreck because you were like a daughter to her. I couldn’t handle the fact that you would be gone. And you… You were hurting because of pain but also because you had to see all of us hurt.

*****

“Ellie, Louis wants to facetime you. Is that okay?”

She slowly nods her head.

Soon Louis is on the screen. His eyes get wide when he sees Ellie. I’m not surprised. She has lost a lot of weight and doesn’t have that happy spark to her.

“Hey El.” Louis says softly.

“Hi.” Her voice is so quiet.

“I’m sorry El. The weather is getting worse. I’m still at the airport.”

“Don’t worry about it Lou. I just want to say that I love you. You are one of my good friends. I’m going to miss you.” Her bottom starts to quiver.

“I- Ellie…” He looks down then back up. His eyes are blood shot.

“Please stay.” He whispers.

“I’m trying babe.”

As they talk, I feel like I shouldn’t be here. I feel as I am invading into their space. But I can’t leave. I want to spend as much time with her as I can.

I’m stirred out of my thoughts when I hear Louis say “I’m sorry if I can’t make to the… To the funeral.”

I look at the screen and see him crying. Louis doesn’t cry that much.

“It’s okay.” She says with a smile.

“I’m tired Louis. I’ll hopefully talk to you later. I love you.”

“I love you too. Bye love.”

“Bye.”

They hang up. I see tears rolling down Ellie’s cheeks.

“Harry you know what I hate about dying?”

“You’re not dying.”

She completely ignores my statement.

“Not only do I have to feel myself die, I have to watch everyone die around me. All because I’m sick. I’m not upset because I’m going to die… I’m upset because I’m hurting everyone I love.”

By this point her voice is hoarse and she is sobbing. I sit on the edge of the bed and pull her into me. Her face buries in my neck.

“I l-love yo-u so-so much. I ha-ate that I am c-c-causing this.” She hiccups.

“Shhhhh.” I say as I push her hair back.

“Ellie, I don’t want you to be stressing over this. You have enough going on right now. So please just rest. You need your strength.”

I kiss the tip of her nose and help her lay back. She quickly goes to sleep. I get settled on the tiny chair and drift off into a place where I don’t have to worry.

I wake up at two o’clock in the morning because I hear Ellie saying “Harry.” I sit up and rub my eyes.

“Harry.” Her voice is soft and horse.

“I’m right here.” I sleepily say, grabbing her hand.

“I need… I need to talk to you.”

“Alright.”

“Harry, just know I love you.”

“I know. I love you too.”

“This is my goodbye.”

My grip tightens on her hand. 

“N-no. This- this can’t b-be. You still have y-your whole li-life.” I stammer.

“I know I already told you goodbye once… But I’m sure this time Harry. I’m struggling to even speak right now…”

I shake my head, biting my lower lip.

“Look I have this for you.”

Her hands shakily grab an envelope with my name on it off the table.

“I want- I want you to read this after everything, when you are ready.”

“Ellie-”

“Please don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

“But-” I don’t finish because I start sobbing. Ellie reaches her hand over and wipes my tears away. She leans up and kisses me. It’s the most passionate kiss I have ever had. Her fingers tug at my hair. Ellie slowly pulls away.

“I will always love you Harry.”

“I love you too.”

Her eyes slowly close. My head shoots up as her heart monitor slows down. No it can’t be. I rush outside into the hall “Nurse, come here! It’s an emergency!” We run into the room together. She pages other doctors and begins to work on her.

“Ellie, please!” I yell. “Don’t be gone!”

“Someone, get him out of here!” a nurse yells.

A nurse pulls me out of the room but not before I hear the heart monitor. It’s a solid beep. The line is straight. I fall to my knees. This is it. She is really gone. I’m never going to see her again.

She is dead.