I don't love you like I did yesterday (Frerard)

Chapter 5: Just friends.

"Oh shit. I guess you're not feeling better after all, eh Frank?" Gerard winked down at me, all surprise he was feeling to my previous words now replaced.

"I g-guess not..." I replied, breathlessly. I fwll faint, so Gerard picked me up swiftly and settled me down next to the toilet. He shuffled behind me, not letting go of me the whole time, his hands sliding around my back as he found his way to my hips to support my weight as I hurled my testicles up in my once white porceline toilet. Why? Why couldn't we have this - minus the puking?

After about 10  minutes of staring at my insides, Gerard finally interupted the silence. 

"S-so, Frank..."

I gulped; I knew where this is going. I really needed to learn to control my emotions.

I tried to play it cool. "Yeah, Gerard?"

"About what you said earlier..." he trailed off, noticing some liquids seeping from my tear ducts and onto his palm. "Frankie, are you alright?" he spoke, almost too quiet and squeaky to hear.

I couldn't reply. I sat, frozen solid, trying to control the waterfalls coming out of my now, red and puffy eyes.

"Gerard, just ignore what I said, it was stupid, okay? I didn't know what I was talking about, I'm sick, rememer?" I sobbed to him inbetween breaths.

"Franks, I know you must have meant something by that."

Just then, I felt it - another vomiting sensation. The nausea overwhelmed me and I puked, again. Gerard supported me once again, sending those oh so familliar shivers up my spine. At least I could blame them on the illness. Not blurting out my feelings at him; that was a mistake.

I found myself awakening in my bed. Gerard was lying next to me, with words I thought he'd never speak.

"I love being with you too, Frankie." He spoke, slow, calm...almost loving.

"Look, G-"

I was interupted by him. "You passed out in front of the toilet after you hurled again. I put you in bed, but I had a lot of time to think about this. You were out for a few hours. I thought about what you said, and the truth is, I do love you. I love being with you, and well-" He leaned in, his lips pressing to mine gently for just a split second. Not wanting to alarm me, or catch my 'illness', the kiss was simple, but I loved it. It was real, not artificial, like the ones he staged.

"W-when? What? How? Where did that come from?"

"I just told you Frank, I love you," he stated simply, a smirk breaking out.

My heart skipped a beat. I felt my chest pulsating as my stomach filled with butterflies and I realized that I could have him, all to myself, with just one question. Will you leave Lindsey? But I couldn't do it. I couldn't bring myself to ask this. He would leave her of his own accord, I couldn't do anything to speed it up...exept maybe this.

My hands slid around his neck, catching him off guard. I threw myself at him, forcefully pressing my lips to his. He pulled away.

I shrivelled into the bed, not wanting to live anymore. "I'm so sorry, Gerard. I'm stupid, so stupid, I shouldn't have done that."

"Listen Frank, I want this, as much as you do, but I'm still with Lindsey, it wouldn't be fair. Me and you, we're friends. Good friends...just friends."

What? Did he realize what he was saying?

"Okay, Gerard, whatever you say. You know, I don't know what's going on with you. Why are you sending me these mixed- look, never mind, just go please." I sternly ordered as I felt the familliar waterfalls as before building up, trying to escape my now, tightly shut eyelids. It's always the same feeling when Gerard disappoints me.

"B-but Frank-"

"Please." My voice was only just a whisper. "Leave."