Dog Love

Dog Love 21

Numbness was all Kahn could feel as he cleaned Joeys skin, ready to wrap in muslin. His fingertips gently stroked the boys hair and he grimaced slightly at the feel of oil that Freya had combed through her sons hair.

"Kahn..."

Pain lanced his heart and he dragged his eyes from Joeys face, were his skin had cooled over two hours ago, and they connected with Shanas. Some where in the darkness light pierced through the foggy veil but for all the wrong reasons. Anger surged up and would have burst in an explosion of heated curses and fist throwing but it was stopped by two things. The first was that it would be completely disrespectful to Joeys passing and the second was Shanas sorrow filled eyes. Kahn took the muslin sheets from Shana and carried them to his lovers body and knelt down next to him.

Shana watched helplessly as Kahn started to wrap Joeys corpse in muslin with such tender care. Kahns long hair was tied back in a loose plait and he was wearing dark mourning clothes, back hunched in defeat and pain. Kneeling down next to him, Shana took the muslin from Kahns trembling hands and helped prepare Joeys body. Sighing slightly Shana bound Joeys hand up noticing that the young mans fingers were slender and unmarred by callouses. As music played outside Kahns figure hunched down as if a weight was dragging him down. Shana touched Kahns shoulder and rested their foreheads together, eyes roaming Kahns face.

"They're waiting for him..."

Shanas heart hurt as Kahns brow furrowed in pain and his head bent lower to the ground. Shana went to comfort him but stilled his hands as Kahn stood up and ran his fingers gently over Joeys cheeks before covering his face and took his lovers body into his arms.

Kahn avoided Freya and Hansels gaze and walked over to the wooden plynth where he would lay Joeys body to rest for finality. His legs felt like he was wading through mud, the air pulling at his arms and torso as if begging him not to let go of Joeys body. Laying his body down, Kahn closed his eyes and rested Joeys hands over his chest where his heart lay still and quiet, never to beat again. Quietly Hansel and Freya moved to Kahns side and knelt down, their hands clasped to their chests in prayer. Tears were tumbling down Freyas cheeks and Kahn gently took one of her hands in his and squeezed it. Together, both parents and Kahn pushed off the plynth into the water and Hansel handed Kahn a torch. Taking it from him, Kahn lowered the torch and watched as the fire licked at the muslin sheets and spread over it like clear water over pebbles. Shana watched quietly as the crowd of people payed their respects. They had travelled to a lake where for many years people had been bringing their deceased loved ones and sent them to the after life. Or at least thats what they believed. Closing his eyes, Shana put a hand over his heart and sang a song he had heard once at Myriams. The sorceror had once lost a close friend and Shana could remember it clearly because he had never known such a beautiful voice could come from someone so cruel and malicious.

"Dearly departed do not stay away for long, Our hearts have grown fond of thys company, Eyes glitter with tears and magicke ascends them to the sky, Where all wishes and dreams gain existance to become alive-"

Kahn listened as Joeys friends, teachers and even some of the market holders started to join in and Kahn finally closed his eyes and ears to the external world.

Shana watched his friend after the crowd started to disperse and sat as the rain drizzled down keeping careful eyes on Kahn. His long sable hair grew heavy with water and his eyes started to tire after a while. He was half asleep when Kahn wandered over to him, eyes heavy with pain and the man leant down in front of Shana. Shana looked up through wet eyelashes and he took Kahns cold body into his arms, grimacing under Kahns tight hold.

"I hate you, I hate myself, everything was fine until I brought you home..."

Shana kept his lips pressed together and he continued to stroke Kahns hair. He couldn't get mad at Kahn because he couldn't understand what his friend was going through. All he could understand was that Kahn was restraining himself and holding his pain inside.

"Let it out, you'll feel much better..."

"I can't! I won't, I don't want any one touching this pain...!"

Shana flinched back from Kahns outburst but kept his arms round him. If he let go he didn't know what Kahn would do. After a few hours they started walking back to the farm. It was cold yet neither man uttered a sound. Freya spotted them from inside the house and flung the door open to find both men stood silently. Kahn didn't lift his eyes to meet hers and it caused fresh pain to well in her heart. She took the young mans hands into hers and kissed his cheek sadly.

"Come stay inside, warm yourself by the fire."

Shana watched as Freya guided Kahn into the house and he turned on his heel, walking towards the stables where his room was waiting for him. As Shana stripped his clothes from his body he did nothing to stop the tears falling down his cheeks. However they were not for Joeys passing, they were for the pain of Kahn moving further from his grasp. Burying into his quilt and hiding his body, Shana closed his eyes and stroked his throat were his choker had once lain. He never noticed the two dead love birds show casing on his window ledge.