Dear Phil,

29

Song to listen to during this chapter: Fools by Troye Sivan
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"Well," Dan began, "I mean, it's kinda like I said before. It'd been a huge change in climate and our whole world, but then again, imagine what's at the bottom of the ocean? We'd be able to find out, finally. And--" Dan stopped.
I don't want a repeat of last time...
Phil glanced over at Dan. "Why'd you stop?" He asked, genuinely curious.
"N-nothing. I just -- wait, take a right here."
Phil nodded, turning on his blinker. "So, what again?"
Dan turned scarlet. "Um, it's not important."
"Yes it is! People's opinions, even if you don't agree with them, are always important."
"Y-yeah, I guess,"
Dan was too embarrassed to say anything. I mean, bruh, Phil almost kissed me, or something. I'm trying to act normal, but...
"Hey, do you mind if we stop in by campus? I need to check in with the office." Phil said cheerfully. He hadn't said anything about Dan not answering the question.
Did Phil let it go?That was, um, nice of him. And right, he starts school tomorrow.
"S-sure. My house is right over by the school anyway."
Silence.
I should say something... Anything. Anything hurts less then this quiet.
But the rest of the trip remained in tense silence, until finally they reached the university.
Phil reached over and unlocked the car door. When Dan gave him a weird look, Phil just said "Sorry, my car doesn't exactly lock automatically, so I have to manually do it," and gave an apologetic smile.
Why is he so fcking cuuuuute.
Dan trailed Phil into the school. Their sneakers made slight squeaking sounds on the tiled floor, but other than that it was quiet.
Half way to the office, Dan remembered something. "Hey, Phil?" He mumbled.
Phil turned to look at him. "Yeah? What is it?"
For a moment, Dan was silent, lost in Phil's blue eyes.
He finally came to his senses, blushed, and spoke. "I, actually want to go grab a book from the library, do you mind if we meet back at your car?" Dan looked at his shoes.
"Go ahead, I wasn't really expecting you to wait around for me anyway," Phil smiled, scratching the back of his neck.
Dan remained looking at his shoes. "Cool," he said, then rushed off, so fast that he didn't register Phil's eyes following him.
•••
That was strange, Dan must've really needed to get that book.
Phil continued to walk, following the mental map in his head.
Though, it most likely was because I freaked him out. God, I always do this.
•••
Dan trekked to the library, his thoughts his only company. When he caught sight of himself in the glass of the door, Dan instantly grimaced.
My cheeks are flushed. He put a finger to them.
Whatever, book finding time.
There was no one in the book haven, and having some space was nice.
He actually was quite lucky that the doors weren't locked, though it seemed kind of strange they were that way...
No matter. He was here now.
•••
"Yeah, I'll see you around!" Phil called cheerfully as he waved goodbye.
Nothing major happened, just some schedule working outs and this and that.
It was actually really easy to get in, I'm surprised. I mean, it's not like anyone knew, but...
Phil shook his head. That was then. This is now.
He walked slowly to his car, afraid of seeing Dan again. Afraid of what he could do to Phil.
Though Phil had slowed his walk to the max, Dan was no where in sight when Phil arrived.
Shrugging, he unlocked the car and sat down. The parking lot was pretty empty, so Phil had parked as close as he could to the school.
It's only been twenty-five minutes. I'm sure Dan'll be out soon.
To pass the time, Phil started drafting ideas for his next video. He could talk about school again, but that'd be boring. Or... How about a Q&A?
That'd be good.
And then Phil remembered that he hadn't checked his comments for his latest video yet.
Happily opening YouTube, he scrolled through the mostly positive comments until one caught his eye.
Yeah, i agree with phan
Phan?
Awwww Philly is so cute! But when can we see ur friends?! Especially that dan guy, I want some phan action!
Phil stared at the screen, mortified.
Okay so for those who don't know, someone commented with ship names, and Dan and Phil seems most popular, hence Phan.
Phil clicked on replies for that comment, praying it wasn't true...
•••
Dan stood frozen behind a bookshelf, praying it wasn't true.
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Lol phan i ship it

sure why not

Another one, and yet another.
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Another one. God, how can I watch this? My heart -- Dan grabbed his chest -- feels funny. My head is pounding. I-I have to get out of here, now!
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"God, I need to get out of this comment section," Phil mumbled to himself.
•••
"Hey, Dan! Come back, what are you doing?!"
But Dan didn't want to hear it anymore. It already hurt so much.
How can Jace say anything to make it better? I saw them, they were kissing. God, Madeline was even undressing.
Dan ran.
Why does this always happen to me?
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*song to listen to before next chapter: I Was Made For Loving You by Tori Kelly

Yo.

Haven't updated in a while.... School! Blame it on that!
Anyway, some interesting little character development on Phil, did you catch that?
Props if you did

So I'm trying to be more consistent, but it's hard! Especially when you're writing two stories at once (one's a work in progress (by Connor franta, order on Amazon or buy at a local bookstore today!) and it's about D&P again).

Also check out my twitter (tartilin) and tumblr (tart-ilin)!

Gettin that promo in.

Stay safe, loves!

♥