[VIXX NEO] My Journey To Happiness

Chapter Three

"Cute," I complimented myself verbally. I looked around my room, possibilities of my members standing behind me was higher. It would be embarrassing if I'd caught, calling myself cute. They all think, I wanted to hear only 'Handsome.'

Luckily I was alone in my room, even though the door was kept open. I took the comb to brush my hair as a final touch, but N's squeal made me jump.

The comb slipped out of my hand and I heard him saying "Everybody, to the hall." His voice was demanding and dominating as usual. I sighed looking at the comb and the thought of bending down to take it was hard.

I snatched the comb and left it on the table before walking outside. I found N in the living room, waiting for us. I was the last person to join.

He glanced at everyone. Ravi was standing in front of him spinning the cap with his index finger. Ken sitting next to Hyuk with eyes on N.

Hyuk ran his fingers through his hair and glanced at me, but I turned my head towards N. I stood beside a chair, where Hongbin was sitting with his cellphone.

I glanced his mobile screen without any intension and he was looking at EXO's performance. I squeezed my brain to think, umm, this performance was like yesterday. I reminded.

N clapped his hands, "Okay. So. We all know about today's charity event. Nothing more than just another performance but it is very special. Because?" He paused to smile at everyone and continued "Since it's for charity, we're going to meet many good people and it will take us closer to our starlights." He said.

I nodded to his words. Ken raised his hand, "I have a doubt". He asked playfully, like a school kid. N's eyes flicked at him, "Yes, Ken?" He encouraged him.

"How you could be so sure that they must be aware of VIXX's existence? Like you said, its just another stage, it could be just another charity event for them? They had any source to know about us?" Ken made a point, which I felt possible.

But, N looked displeased, "Whatever! But, there could be some people who will recognize us. And if not, that's fine too. Because its the first time we're doing something like this and I can't wait to meet them." He exclaimed.

"Right. No problem, if they ain't know who we are, its better that way. May. Be." Ravi quoted. I just stayed quite. As usual.

N stared at Ken and continued his speech after the interruption was over, "You know what's more important today?" He asked with a big smile on his face, that made him innocent and cute.

Nobody gave a reaction and it was clear nobody understood his words.

He said, "Smile" pointing to his lips that formed a beautiful curve, a smile. He added, "Smile so that they would know how pleased we are to perform there, today. Probably most of them are under 16, kids. You should be active and energetic. A smile will help you to express." His eyes shined when he said "Kids", I truly understand that.

What seemed harder to understand is the fact behind that happiness. I mean, they're orphans, no parents or family. How is it possible to be happy by looking at their faces. I thought.

Why I cannot see the things like my members do? They look excited and happy. But I was the one holding my heart, into my hands.

"Aren't you sad?" I asked Hongbin, who was sitting next to me. "Huh?" he looked a little lost into his own world. I'm not the type to repeat my questions, so I stayed silent.

"Ah, I know what you mean." He looked like, recollected my voice from his subconscious mind. He looked at me, "Well Leo, we all know the fact that God will share equally to everyone, but human beings cannot understand his plans. I'm sure he has valid reasons, for every ounce of this world."

I couldn't conclude his words. I blinked my eyes, twice. He squeezed my shoulder a little, "I am not being rude to say 'You get, what you deserve,' hell no." He shook his head twice.

"Umm, let me tell you this way: Everybody have their own meaning to happiness. You cannot say what makes you happy, would make others too. Ignoring some raw facts of common HappinessFeedingThings, you can empathize that happiness could be found in any form." He pressed his lips tight, forming a line. He does that whenever he was thinking about something serious.

"Conclude," I said. I sounded stupid but I wanted to know more. He looked surprised but then he laughed. After looking at my stubbornness, he straightened his back.

He breathed out, "Its true they have no families, but they have no worries either. I know they need a family, but they aren't homeless. They have less pressure of responsibilities, even though the reality is a bitter truth. At last I would like to say, no human knows the value of what they have and always chase behind the thing that others have. So, even though you don't have a major part of being a human, a family. You can be happy, because 'you' should be your first priority and responsibility." He tried so hard to explain.

He tried to smile, but it faded very soon as N jumped over him. N sat on his lap, wrapping his arms around him. "You always makes me feel proud about the way I raised you." N said and kissed Hongbin's cheek.

Hongbin tried hard to push him away but N's grip was never easy. "Hey, Hyukkie, instead of helping me out, you're laughing there? I'll treat you after." He almost yelled. But nothing worked on N, who was still holding Hongbin tightly with a grin on his face.

"You've been there, before?" I asked Hongbin, out of curiosity. He answered me, being squeezed by N, "Yes, twice. When I wasn't a part of VIXX."

I pushed N away with enough force, who was interrupting our conversation. I again asked "Was it good?" I felt little embarrassed for pushing the subject deeper. "Of course and that's how I've learned this." He replied in a hurry and ran behind N.

Hmmm, I've learned something and I'll write it in my diary. I told myself.

"Shall we, move?" Ken asked.

"Wait, I've something important." Ravi said, rushing towards the washroom. Hongbin laughed at Ravi's stupid act. I grimaced.

"Let's do the show without our main rapper and lock the main door now. Let's go out first. And yeah, I'll cover his rap." Hyuk tried to pull out a joke but it came out serious from his tone. He always wanted to try Ravi's part, we all knew about it.

N laughed, but then he said "No, I won't go without my Ravi." He stared at Hyuk. Hyuk made a face, "But you laughed at first. Liar."

N looked displeased with Hyuk. "Beautiful Liar," Hyuk said playfully. Sounds like he was getting obsessed with my song.

N threw a stuffed doll at Hyuk's face, "How dare you? I never cheat people." What? I wasn't playing a cheater role in that song! I thought.

Hyuk rubbed his face, where the doll hit him. "Mommy, you understands me so well. That scares the hell out of me, sometimes." He said. N looked so pleased by Hyuk's confession. But, I still couldn't get the point.

Ken asked "Oh, that song? Beyonce and, umm who?" He asked pulling his eyebrows together. "Shakira," N answered proudly because he knew Hyuk wasn't talking about my song. That surprised me too. N knows everything which always makes us want to keep distance with him.

"That's why you look like mom & son. You guys have good understanding." Ravi appeared in to the scene. "Okay, dad." Hyuk said and laughed at his own comment. "Is there something going on that I didn't know, huh?" Hongbin teased Ravi. He looked clearly annoyed. "You guys are sick," he said. Ken grimaced.

Before it gets dirtier I reminded them about the charity event.

"Yes, yes. Now please, stop playing around. We've got better things to do." N growled and finally concentrated on something valuable.