Who Dun It?

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"The metal machine confirms. The spider devices have infiltrated the whole of Platform One." Jabe announced to her fellow aliens. "How's that possible? Our private rooms are protected by a code wall. Moisturise me, moisturise me." Cassandra panicked, scared. "Summon the Steward." Moxx declared. "I'm afraid the Steward is dead." Jabe sadly informed them. "Who killed him?" Moxx asked, but was rudely interrupted by Cassandra. "This whole event was sponsored by the Face of Boe. He invited us. Talk to the Face. Talk to the Face." Her voice had a rough edge to it. "Easy way of finding out. Someone bought their little pet on board. Let's send him back to master." The Doctor and I had just shown up, startling the crowd. The Doctor put down the spider that Jabe was scanning, and it scuttles off to Cassandra and scanned her, then goes to the black gowned group. The Adherents of the Repeated Meme. J'accuse!" Cassandra gasped, sounding fake.

"That's all very well, and really kind of obvious, but if you stop and think about it.." I stood forward, a boost of confidence flowing through my body. I went over to the Adherants. Their leader's arm flew out and tried to her me, but I was quick. I pulled off its arm, revealing wires and sparks. "A Repeated Meme is just an idea. And that's all they are, an idea." I was happy with my conclusion. I pulled one of the many wires in the arm and the black clothed figures collapsed.
Remote controlled Droids. Nice little cover for the real troublemaker. Go on, Jimbo. Go home." I nudged the slider with my foot and it returned to Cassandra.

"I bet you were the school swot and never got kissed. At arms!" She yelled at me, and her attendants raised their spray guns. "What are you going to do, moisturise her?" The Doctor came up and put his arm over my shoulder, faking being hurt in the chest. "With acid. Oh, you're too late, anyway. My spiders have control of the mainframe. Oh, you all carried them as gifts, tax free, past every code wall. I'm not just as pretty face." Cassandra told us. "Sabotaging a ship while you're still inside it? How stupid's that?" I laughed.

"I'd hoped to manufacture a hostage situation with myself as one of the victims. The compensation would have been enormous." She bragged. "Five billion years and it still comes down to money." I muttered darkly.
"Do you think it's cheap, looking like this? Flatness costs a fortune. I am the last human, Doctor. Rebel. Me. Not that freaky little kid of yours. Rose was i? Oh and Rebel? Might want to try it it sometime, you've got a bit of a nose dear.." She angered me. The Doctor's grip on my shoulders tightened as I tired to go after the flab of skin. "Arrest her, the infidel!" Moxx cried out. "Oh, shut it, pixie. I've still got my final option." She sighed, not a bit of remorse in her voice.

"Earth Death in three minutes."

"And here it comes. You're just as useful dead, all of you. I have shares in your rival companies and they'll triple in price as soon as you're dead. My spiders are primed and ready to destroy the safety systems. How did that old Earth song go? Burn, baby, burn." She said as she smirked. "Then you'll burn with us." Jabe stepped forward, angry. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I know the use of teleportation is strictly forbidden, but I'm such a naughty thing. Spiders, activate." Her cold voice caused a series of explosions through the Platform.

"Forcefields gone with the planet about to explode. At least it'll be quick. Just like my fifth husband. Oh, shame on me." Cassandra smirked evilly. The Computer announced that its systems were failing and Cassandra's attendants came next to her. "Bye, bye, darlings. Bye, bye, my darlings." Her attendants and her beamed out of the room. Leaving the tests of us in panic. "Heat levels rising." The computer said.
"Reset the computer." Moxx yelled, not helping. "Only the Steward would know how..." Jabe said sadly, thinking about the man who had died. "No. We can do it by hand. There must be a system restore switch. Jabe, come on. You lot, just chill." I laughed and grabbed the Doctor's and Jabe's hand, pulling them to the Engine Room.

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