The Asgardian Civil War (Loki FanFiction)

Why doesn't he love me?

We sat in chairs that were right next to each other. Loki was turned sideways in his chair, looking at me. I had tears falling down my face slowly from the thoughts that were running through my mind.

Why doesn’t he love me? Shouldn’t fathers love their daughters? What did I ever to make him hate me so much?

“What are you thinking about?” Loki asked softly. I shook my head.

“Nothing.” I whispered, wiping away tears. Loki reached out and wiped away one that I missed.

“You’re thinking about your family, aren’t you?”

“Only one of them is true family to me.”

“And that’s your twin?”

“He’s the only one that doesn’t hate me.” I whispered, nodding my head. There were a few minutes of silence. I ran through all of the things that I could have ever done to make him hate me.

I failed to save my mom’s life. I lost a fake fight with Loki. And I was asked to join S.H.I.E.L.D. and he wasn’t.

That’s it!

“Do you think he hates me because S.H.I.E.L.D. wants me?” I whispered, finally looking at Loki. His eyes were hard.

“Possibly.” He said. “I don’t see a reason for anybody to hate you.”

“Well he obviously has one.” I said, pointing to my cheek. Loki laughed sympathetically.  I sank lower in my chair, turning my body and throwing my legs over the arm of the chair so I was facing Loki. “I hate this. I hate guessing.”

“Guessing what?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Guessing why he hates me. If I knew, I could try to fix it. But I can’t do that if I don’t know the reason, can I?” I asked rhetorically.

“How do you feel about him?”

“What do you mean?” I asked him.

“Do you want to hurt him, or would you take a bullet for him?” Loki asked me.

“Both.”

“No, no, no. You can’t pick both.” Loki said while smiling a little.

“Well I’d love to beat the shit out of him but if it came down to it, I’d jump in front of a bullet for him. I hate everything about him. I have to love him.” I explained.

“No you don’t” Loki said automatically. I was confused.

“What?”

“You’re not bound to love him just because he’s your father. You’re allowed to rebel from normality. It’s obviously not who you are to love him. Your personality screams rebellion.  You’re allowed to want to kill your father. I killed mine.” Loki explained.

“You killed Odin?” I nearly yelled, clearly confused.

“No. My real father. Laufey. It’s not that hard to do.” He said. I relaxed. I honestly thought he killed the All Father.

“I don’t think I can handle the emotional stress of that.” I said quietly.

“Are you just going to let him abuse you? You do know you have to go home, right?” He said and I shook my head.

“You’re still a minor. You can’t just walk into a hotel and get a room. You don’t have any friends left after they watched you kill your boyfriend.”

“I’ll be 18 in a week.”

“So? That doesn’t mean you’ll have anywhere to go.” He responded. I looked down.