Shattered Rose

EPILOGUE

I lay quietly on the grass, soaking up the May sun as I waited for Parker to meet me there after his last final. Mine had been done for days, and to my joy, I had managed to pull the 4.0 GPA required to get off probation. I had also found my second love-structures. I spent the last three months in the structures department helping graduate students work on building multiple things for state-wide competitions. Our latest project was a canoe, and I'm proud to say that ours was one of only ten that actually stayed above water for the entire race. Dr. Davis was thrilled. It had also been four months since my last episode. I almost expected to never be tempted again once I became a Christian, but that wasn't the case. The temptations were still there. The lies I had believed for so long still lingered, but it no longer felt hopeless, and I knew one day God would deliver me from this. In His timing. More than anything, I knew that secrets were tools the enemy used to keep me in bondage, so I tried my best to tell Parker every time I was tempted. I also promised to tell him if I ever again had an episode. Honesty meant freedom. Parker had encouraged me to start seeing a counselor on campus, and she was really helping me find alternate means of coping when life started to feel stressful and out of control. I also learned that dieting only exacerbated my problem and found volume control was the best deterrent I had for binging. I chuckled to myself as I thought of the goodbye ceremony I had for my scale. It was my counselor's idea, and I have to say not a day goes by that I'm not thrilled I finally chucked that thing. It had held me captive for way too long. A shadow crept over my face, and I knew without looking that it was Parker. I pulled him close for a lingering kiss, knowing each day I fell more and more in love with him. "How was it?"I asked enthusiastically, so glad we were both finally be done and could get the summer started. We had planned a month long road trip that included stops at both of our parents'houses. "I survived,"he said as he pulled me up off the grass. "I kept getting distracted by thoughts of you!""Me? Well, I won't complain,"I teased as I threw my arms around his neck to kiss him. He smiled back at me and then looked a little nervous. He pulled me in for one more kiss and then started, "Avery, you know I love you. I have since the first time I saw you. And every day we spend together, I am more and more sure that we are meant to be together forever. You inspire me and make me want to be a better person, not just for myself, but also for you, so I can be the kind of man you will love for a lifetime. The thing is, I'm impatient, and I want that lifetime to start now, so..."My breath caught as I watched him drop to his knee and pull out a small black box. "Avery Elizabeth Nichols, will you do me the honor of walking through this crazy world with me, allowing me to love and adore you for the rest of our lives?"I didn't need even a second to respond. "Yes,"I answered without hesitation. "Only if you let me love and adore you right back."He pulled out the ring, a small round diamond on a delicate gold band, and placed it on my finger. The students who had witnessed our display began to clap as Parker swung me around and kissed me, his enthusiasm apparent to everyone around us. "I love you,"he said with a grin, staring deep into my eyes. "With everything I am.""I love you, too,"I whispered