Anything Goes (Scomiche)

Misbehavin

I had this thought the other day about the song Misbehavin and it's been stuck in my brain. Also, my brain hasn't been working which is why I've been MIA for a while and why this 1k word one shot literally took me all day. It's trash, but I gotta get my writing button working again somehow.

A million miles away and I'm still thinkin bout my baby.

Things just sort of happened, and I can't say I did anything to stop them. By the time I figured out that I was falling for my best friend it was too late. I fell and fell hard. Luckily though, Mitch fell too.

It was a slow progression, but feelings, late night passion in hotel rooms, and long nights on a tour bus where I couldn't cuddle him were all happening during tour. It was an adventure for both of us. Things were changing and I was happy, he was happy, we were happy.

There was a tiny, tiny, problem though. My boyfriend, Alex.

Oh but I, know that I, can be wild sometimes.

Mitch and I were constantly covering our tracks. We've always been flirty, even before this whole thing started... The simple touches and innuendos. But the difference now is the eye contact, how we look at each other...With pure love and adoration. I see it in his eyes and I know he sees it in mine. We also know the fans see it. They see it and screen shot it, post it everywhere, and it's only a matter of time before Alex sees it. Before Alex calls, needing my attention and reassurance that it means nothing. It was annoying, but in hindsight, I see where all the jealousy comes from.

The worst part though wasn't even keeping things from my boyfriend, it was keeping them from the band. No one could know, not even the other three who I considered family. Mitch and I knew what we were doing was wrong, but we were too infatuated, too in love to care. We didn't want the judgment of them on us, it was less messy this way.

I lied. The worst part is not being able to show all the affection I want towards Mitch whenever I want. Sure, I can pass on doing the simple things we always used too, but there were no kisses, no saying I love you, little things I always thought about doing. It was hard making sure I didn't slip, didn't reveal that anything more was happening between us. In the end though, I always got to make it up to him and then some whenever we stayed at a hotel. I stashed away the kisses, staring in to each other's eyes, the way he moaned my name, all those little things I wanted, for later to get me through until the next time.

We decided to keep things exactly the way they were. Yes, it was a hassle to hide things, and if I could, I'd shout it from the top of the Eiffel Tower how much I loved him. But to keep our private lives private and things easier for both of us, even if at times it didn't seem easier, we wanted this. For now, this worked.

Our escape from home and from reality, quickly ended when, halfway through tour, my boyfriend Alex decided to join us. Whether that was more so because he wanted to be with me or keep an eye out on me, I don't know. But let me tell you, it was a long week. It was a week of not spending much time with Mitch unless we were at rehearsals or the show, a week of keeping the two most important people in my life separate and trying to keep things civil. It was a week without kissing Mitch and I hated it. I knew Mitch was struggling, seeing Alex and I together, me pretending to be a caring boyfriend and Alex clinging to me every chance he got. My heart hurt for Mitch and I just wanted to scoop him up and hide away from the world, but I couldn't. We both knew that.

I love Alex, I do, and he's a great guy. But he's not Mitch. He's not the brown eyed boy with the bright, dimpled smile that makes my heart flutter every time I get to see it. Or the boy with the brilliant laugh and singing voice that is too pure for this world. Or the boy who fits perfectly wrapped in my arms at night or whose lips fit perfectly against mine. Or the boy who knows just what to say to bring a smile to my face or to keep me grounded with all the chaos that goes on in our daily lives. The list could literally go on forever.

I think Alex always suspected it, which is why there was always a hint of resentment toward Mitch. Why there was always a hint of jealousy that laced his words towards Mitch. Mitch took it in stride though, trying to be as kind as ever to Alex, for my sake, and for the sake of our relationship. I'd confront Alex on it and then he'd get upset that I was defending Mitch, that I cared for Mitch more. He knew it, I knew it, but it was never admitted out loud. It never needed to be said.

Oh but I, never lie.

So we came up with the idea to write a song, together, for Alex. It seemed like a brilliant idea. Something that could help ease his mind while I was away, something to show him that there was nothing going on between Mitch and I while we were gone. To help convince him. We figured if we both wrote it, and we both I sang it, it was a mutual agreement between us both that things were strictly platonic between us and that I loved Alex...which obviously wasn't entirely true. But the whole point was to keep that a secret so if this little lie worked, then it was all worth it.

It did work. Alex loved the song, he thought it was the sweetest thing and it got him off my back just a little. It soothed that little green monster in him. It was a song that, when he felt any jealousy, he could listen to and be reminded of me and our relationship.

Little does Alex know, that I'm always Misbehavin.

Yeah I'm havin a good time, but I'd rather be with you.