Anything Goes (Scomiche)

Pretending Pt. 4

We have reached the end folks, hope you had fun!

Good luck, it's a roller coaster.

Mitch was right.

It doesn't feel weird once they're back. They continue their lives just like before... at least that's what they think. Until New Year's Eve when they're around other friends. Scott can't help but feel like everyone's staring at them. He doesn't know if he's gone paranoid or if something is up, but it doesn't feel right. It's confirmed when he steps out of the bathroom and gets cornered by Avi with a suspicious look on his face. Avi gives him a once over, making the blonde shift uncomfortably before opening his mouth.

"Did something happen with you and Mitch?" He asks, surprising Scott.

"Mitch? No. At least I don't think so. We're good as always, why?" Scott doesn't see why they're talking about this. They're acting like they always do, laughing, and sharing inside looks that only they know what they mean.

"You've always been close, but tonight you're down right gravitating around each other. I don't know if you've been more than ten feet apart. It just seems... different." Avi explains, contemplative.

Scott doesn't know what to say. Are they really acting different? It felt normal between them even though he was worried at first.

"I...I didn't notice." he stutters, searching for the right answer. He loves Avi and knows he can talk to him about anything, but he doesn't even know how to put into words what he's feeling now. "I mean... I don't know. Nothing feels different." He can't look Avi in the eyes because he knows it's not true. He's not ready to admit it because it seems like he's the one that's gonna end up with the broken heart.

When Avi leaves it at that, Scott finds himself breathing heavily. He's close to a panic attack. He stays in the hallway, calming his nerves. No one comes to look for him and he's glad. He couldn't have explained what was happening, even if he wanted too. When he gets back to the room, the first person he sees is obviously Mitch. You can't miss him with his laugh on full display for everyone to hear. He radiates like the sunshine, bringing joy to everyone and everything and Scott just wants to throw up. He stays away from him for the remainder of the night, not missing Avi watching him and Mitch's worried looks. This is gonna be a tough thing to get through, he thinks as they celebrate.

And Scott's right.

It's their last year and they have more work, harder work too, and at the end of February he can't wait for his exams to be over and put an end to this torture. But it's nothing compared to what's been growing in his mind and his heart. Scott misses kissing Mitch goodnight. He misses touching him. He misses him period even though he's right there. When he looks back on it, he can admit that he probably always had a crush on the brunette. He always loved him more than anyone else. Right from the start, Mitch was his favorite. And the more he got to know him, the more he grew fond of him. But right now, it's worse, it's gotten so much worse and Scott doesn't know what to do.

Now Scott knows what it's like to be the center of Mitch's world. He knows how it feels to touch him and to be touched by him. He knows what it's like to kiss him goodnight and good morning. He knows so much more, more than a friend should know about another, but he knows it and it fucked everything up. He can't go back and unlearn these things. He has to live with it and deal with it. That's why he went back home for spring break. Without Mitch, to the great despair of his mother. He wanted to take his mind off of things but it only got worse because his mom is even more fond of Mitch than he is it seems. She couldn't stop talking about how great he is, how much she loves him, and how she's so happy Scott found someone so special. It doesn't help anything at all.