the girl named winter

| 07 |

s e v e n
d a y s
b e f o r e

I twirl my paintbrush within my fingers as I stare at the blank canvas before me.

Behind it is the scenery my window offers.

The leaves and roofs are covered with snow as the wind carries white dust-like particles. Snowflakes shower the whole town, aiming to give happiness, completely contradicting the emptiness I feel.

I dip my paintbrush in black.

I dip it in water to remove its color.

Then to gray.

Back to the water.

Then back to black.

I stare at the canvas harder.

I focus and try to think something paint-worthy aside from his face.

I look around my room.

I look outside.

I look at my canvas.

I look at the pink walls.

I look at my phone.

I pick it up and wonder how Blue's doing.

My finger hovers over the call button, but I never press it.

Blue's probably getting tired of me.

Suddenly, anger attacks me and it sinks its teeth into me.

He can't just leave me and tell me to go away just when I was having the time of my life.

He can't just tell me to get lost after I showed him the straight path.

He can't just push me away when he's the one who pulled me towards me.

He can't just ignore me.

It's Christmas.

It's winter.

I'm Winter.

And I'm not going to give up on Blue.

Not this time.

I press the call button too hard.

I place my phone to my ear.

"What's your problem?" Blue shouts from the other line.

I jump, not because of his tone, but because he actually picked the phone up.

We still have a chance.

"I told you to leave me alone!"

I take a shaky breath as I close my eyes. "Blue."

"I hate you, Winter."

I snap my eyes open.

"I hate you so much."