The Rhythm of the Rain (Patrick Stump / Fall Out Boy Fanfic)

Chapter 4 - I Know I Expect Too Much

                  

Lily Matthews

            The day before tour started, we decided to do a last minute shoot for Where Did the Party Go. We didn't want to have to wait until we got back from tour, since we already had access to the hospital we would be filming in, so we figured we might as well get it over with. I had just finished the boys' makeup as well as all of the zombie extras, and I was now sitting outside the hospital, watching Patrick scream and chase after the others. Again, his acting was amazing. Once we all moved into the building, I was secluded to one of the larger rooms where most of my zombies would begin following Patrick. I was doing a few touch ups while we were waiting, and finally, I had a chance to watch Patrick again.

            Before the scene began, I watched Patrick talking to the girl dressed as a nurse. She had bleached blonde hair, and her boobs could barely be contained in her skimpy little nurse's uniform. I don't where it came from or why it was happening, but I felt a stabbing pang of jealousy when he laughed at something she said. She kept touching his arm, flirting with him openly. He kept smiling at her, not quite in the way he usually smiled at me, but still enough that I couldn't look away.

            I didn't realize I had been staring until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I flinched and looked back to find Pete standing over me, a concerned look on his face. "Lily," he breathed, dropping his hand as I pulled away from him.

            "Not right now, Pete," I snapped, pushing past him and beginning to walk away.

            Unfortunately, he followed me. "Lily! What happened?"

            "Nothing, Pete! I'm busy!" I yelled back, storming out of the room and down the hall. I stormed all of the way out of the hospital and towards me trailer. Everyone was inside, so there was nobody to see us when Pete called after me again.

            "Lily, wait!" I finally stopped, not turning to look at him, but I could hear his footsteps as he came closer and put his hand on my shoulder again, turning me to him. "What happened? You looked upset in there."

            "I'm not upset," I insisted, even though my eyes were welling up with tears. What was wrong with me? I had nothing to be upset about. Nothing.

            "Lily," Pete repeated, "Tell me what happened."

            "I don't know," I whimpered, beginning to break down and I genuinely didn't know why. "I don't know, Pete."

            He quickly pulled me into his arms, holding my head against his shoulder as I started crying. I wasn't upset. If I was, I would know why, but I have no idea what was making me react like this. It certainly wasn't that girl...it certainly wasn't Patrick. He was just my friend. I had no reason to cry over him talking to another girl. Pete seemed to know why I was upset, even though I didn't, but he still wanted me to say it. He wanted me to admit something to him that wasn't true at all. "Lily, I saw them too. It's okay," he whispered against my hair, "He wasn't flirting with her like he flirts with you."

            "It's not him," I insisted, pounding a fist lightly against Pete's chest. Trying to convince myself more so than him.

            "It is, Lily," Pete said, "And it's okay."

            "I don't have feelings for Patrick," I cried, sobbing harder when I said it. That shouldn't upset me either. He was my friend, admitting that he was just that and nothing more should not hurt me at all, but it did.

            "Lily," Pete said, a slight smile in his voice. "What do I have to do to make you see?" He whispered, "To make both of you see?"

            I pushed away from him and looked up at him through my tears. "What are you talking about, Pete?" I asked, wiping the tears from my eyes and trying to compose myself. "See what?"