The next few days of school were so-so. I got a ton of compliments on my boots. Jacob kissed me a few more times. Everyone knew we were dating for real now. Erik still ignored me.
On Saturday, I had to go to Fun4All. Fun4All was a 'fun-filled' day once a month for families with all different kinds of Autism. And since I was on the spectrum, my family decided to start taking me back in fourth grade.
I don't think of myself as having Autism. I think of it as not very serious ADHD, because it's nothing more than some fidgeting and the occasional meltdown.
Dad didn't come. Not like I wanted him to. Mom and me drove to the community centre where it was held. We walked towards the gym building. As we opened the doors, a bunch of kids came up to hug me.
"AMI!" they cried.
These kids weren't half bad. To some of them I was their only friend. Like Sarah. She has plain ol' Autism. She finds it hard to be social with 'normal' people. She just starts rambling about the latest episode of Little Charmers, her favourite show. She's 7 and soooo sweet, too. Sarah's mom owns a bakery in Portland, so Sarah's family always brings goodies for the other families.
There's also Tyler, who's 9. He has ADHD, too. But his is way more complicated than mine. He has to take medication and he always runs around. He likes to dance, so we sometimes turn on the Katy Perry and go wild.
I'm probably the oldest kid their. I don't stop my parents from taking me because it's so nice to have a room full of people who don't care if you fart, or if your clothes aren't trendy, or even that you have ADHD. The kids are my homies. That's all their is to it.
Today, Miss Kelly, the leader, says our first activity is painting. Fuck! I have no art skills at all, and we have to sit down. Yeah, that's a problem for the ADHD kids.
We put some chairs and tables in a circle. Miss Kelly gives us each a canvas and a paint set.
I decide, even though I have no skills, to paint my life. Well, not actually. In one corner, I have an angry house, to show that things are tense at my home. In another corner, I draw some hearts, full and broken, to show my crushes. In another, I put some girls wearing PINK hoodies, laughing. They represent Gail and her friends. In the final corner, I paint a tombstone, because of Josie. In the middle, I paint myself, but my brain is visible. My brain has lightning bolts coming out of it, to show my brain is different.
Huh, maybe I do have some artist in me.
"What's THAT?" a kid named Joanna asks, pointing at the house.
"An angry house."
"Why?" Then her face froze. I saw a tear fall down her cheek. "IS THAT THE BIG BLUE HOUSE THAT THE BEAR LIVES IN? IS THAT WHY IT'S ANGRY, BECAUSE THE BEAR IS SCARY?" She started to cry. Her mom ushered her away.
Mental note: don't talk about Bear in the Big Blue House with Joanna.
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Flowers on Her Grave
Ficțiune adolescenți~Cover credit to JulienCarter~ The last line of her suicide note was "Put flowers on my grave, so I'll look pretty." Josie killed herself the night before junior prom. Being her best friend, Amalie knew she would attempt suicide eventually, with her...
