Don't Leave Me Alone | TØP

Chapter 5 // Josh

I slowly open my eyes, finding myself under a very bright light.

I notice my head hurts a lot and I try to remember why. And that's when I realize I'm on top of a stretcher.

I try to sit up but my back seems to hurt too. I let out a long sigh, closing my eyes again. And then I start to remember when I passed out in the hospital corridor, the two nurses who stopped me and when I screamed multiple times.

And then I remember Tyler.

I suddenly open my eyes and sit up, not caring about the pain in my back.

Tyler.

I gulp. I remember seeing Tyler, unconscious, badly hurt, he almost seemed dead.

No, he's not dead, he can't be.

I feel guilty as hell. What I saw was my fault. I did that to him.

Stop thinking!

But my mind won't shut up and I want to scream again.

"Hey, do you feel okay?" I hear someone whispering on my ear.

I suddenly turn around just to find a nurse awkwardly smiling at me. I rub my eyes, trying to understand what's happening.

"Uh?" That's the only thing I say.

"You passed out yesterday but as I can see you're okay now." The nurse sighs. "I don't want to worry you, but you're Tyler Joseph's bandmate, right?"

I nod, suddenly feeling down.

"I'm pretty sure you want to see him, right?" She continous.

I hold my head in my hands. My head hurts harder this time and tears run down my cheeks. Just the simple thought of him makes me want to fall to the floor and cry for God knows how long.

"I'm sorry!" The nurse bites her lip. "I didn't want to make you cry, sorry."

"It's okay." I wipe away the tears. "You did nothing wrong."

The nurse lets out a long sigh.

"Are you sure you feel okay?"

This time I shake my head.

"I want to stay here for a while, I don't feel okay." I gulp. "Please."

She nods, but she also seems insecure.

"Okay. I'll come later."

And then she walks away from me.

~

I don't remember how long I stayed on that stretcher but when I felt "okay" I begged the nurse to take me to see him. She didn't say anything, she just took me down a corridor.

Right now I'm sitting on a chair waiting for the doctor so he can take me to see Tyler, and I have to admit it, I've never felt so anxious in my life.

I'm trying not to think too much about what happened yesterday, I don't want to cry again.

"Josh?"

I suddenly shake my head and that's when I see a blonde woman walking towards me. She looks worried and her face is all pale.

Jenna.

Oh no.

"Josh!" She takes a sit next to me. "Are you okay? How's Tyler? Do you know anything about him?"

I blink twice, trying to understand what she's saying.

"Jenna..." I gulp. "What are you doing here?"

She bites her lip. She looks even more worried than me.

"Mark called me last night. He told me about Tyler's accident. And, well, I saw it on tv too. So I took a plane and tried to come as fast as I could." She sighs. "Is he okay? Did you see him?"

"Not yet." I rub my head, kinda uncomfortable.

Jenna doesn't say anything for a while. Me neither. We are just waiting for the doctor to come.

After minutes of waiting I finally see a doctor walking towards us and I stand up, not thinking it twice. Jenna also stands up.

"Doctor," I try to hold my excitement. "Is he okay? Can we see him?"

The doctor just stares at me for a few seconds.

"Listen, Josh, I can let you see him, but it's going to be kinda hard. He's very badly hurt, and I would prefer someone from his family to see him."

"I'm his wife, doctor." Jenna bites her lip again, trying to stay calm. "His family must be on the way."

"Well, in that case, only the wife can see him." The doctor looks at me. "Sorry Josh. You need to wait. I hope you understand."

I nod, doing my best to stay calm. I understand this whole situation perfectly. Jenna has the right to see him first because, anyway, she's his wife. But I really want to see Tyler. That's the only thing I have in mind by the moment.

Jenna glances at me for the last time and then she disappears into the corridor with the doctor by her side.

I let out a long, worried, sigh and I sit down again.

~

Jenna comes back after a long time, tears in her eyes. I get anxious when I see her again and I bite my lip.

"Josh," Jenna rubs her eyes. "are you sure you want to see him?"

I nod.

"Obviously. Is anything wrong?"

She takes a moment to calm down and then she pats my shoulder (that is weird tho).

"The doctor didn't want to tell us anything, but I hope you understand Tyler is not conscious at all. He will not wake up in a while."

I know what she's talking about but still I don't want to accept it.

"What are you talking about?" I'm pretty sure I look like a toddler right now. "Jenna, are you sure?"

Jenna sighs and holds the tears back.

"He's in a coma, Josh." She's almost crying. "And the doctor thinks he has only a little chance to survive."

(Edited 06/16/16)