I Can't Help but Want You

Chapter 7

For three weeks I slept in Jasper bed, until his scent faded away and was covered by my own. It was then I realized he was never coming back. I cried for days after that realization came to me. Luke showed up one day out of the blue. I was in my room reading over the poem Jasper had written for his rose, when the butler walked into my room.

"You have a guest, miss Rosey."

Behind her was Luke. "Hey babe, you look awful," he said with a concerned look walking over to my bedside.

"What are you doing here, go away I look like a mess."

"Yeah you do, but it's okay, we're a couple so I have to be there for you right?" I giggled. "Now come here," he pulled me into his arms and held me close. "What are you reading?" He reached for the paper.

"It's nothing." I pulled it away from him.

"If it's nothing then let me see it," he smiled but I could tell he was suspicious. He reached over me for the paper again. I fell back on the bed and he leaned over top of me. I let the paper fall over the edge of the bed onto the floor. He looked me in the eyes, they were glistening with lust. His face wasn't smiling anymore. "Okay, it's nothing." He kissed me grabbing my hands and putting them around his back. He pushed his pelvis off of me and pulled his knees up to my sides on the bed. He kissed me harder shoving his tongue into my mouth.

Since we had been dating things had been getting more and more sexual. He groped my breasts. "Ah," I moaned. His hands were so large but they still didn't cover my entire breast. "Luke," I said between breaths.

"Rosey," he growled, Kissing me harder.

"No," I gasped, "Luke stop." I put my hands on his chest lightly pushing him away.

"Why?" He said leaning back in and kissing me again.

"Please Luke, not now. I'm not ready."

"Oh I'll make you ready," he smirked. He brought his pelvis down on me, I could feel him pressing against me. I bit my lip.

"I'm serious stop." I pushed him away from me.

"What?" He sat up off me.

"I'm still upset about my brother, a-and, we haven't been dating for that long."

He looked annoyed, "So you're just going to leave me horny?"

"I just want to wait a few months, just so I'm sure this thing is going to work out. Can you do that for me please?" I pouted my lip, and gave him my cutest puppy dog eyes.

"Sure babe, I guess I could wait, for you." He ran his fingers through my hair. He gave me another peck with a smile before getting up off of me and heading out of my room. I got up and hid the poem in my dresser, then followed him out of the room.

It was the end of December now, four months since Jasper left. After a month of him being gone we called the police. I was sure they would find him and bring him back home, but they never found him. They looked for two weeks and gave up, what kind of police force were they just giving up. When October 16th came around, Jasper's birthday, I laid a present in his room. So when he did come back he wouldn't have missed his birthday entirely. It was just a skateboard I had seen him looking at before, it was very high tech and expensive. The picture on the bottom was of a black rose, I had had it custom made. I left a note on the back of it saying

I miss you, I have never given up wishing for you to come home. I bought you this to show you that I do care about and that I notice the little things. I want us to be close again, like we used to. Even though I know you don't want that, I still wait for that day.

-Love Rose

I was very out of it the last few weeks, I still didn't want to believe he was gone for good. I wanted so bad to know why he ran away. Why he didn't tell me. Luke would try to talk to me about it and compare this to losing a football game, but this was nothing like a football game. This was real life and I was just going to have to accept the fact that my brother was gone.

"Rosey?" My mother said walking into Jasper's room where I was. I was laying on his bed looking up at the ceiling, it was the first time I had been in here since October. I don't know what made me want to come in here today but it lured me in. "There you are," my mother said with kind smile.

"HI mom," I glanced over at her then looked back up at the ceiling.

"This is how you're coping huh?" I didn't answer. "Henry's coping with work, he's down in the study again." I didn't say anything, I just sighed. "Honey I know you're upset about Jasper running away, but you have to face the facts he's gone. You need to stop sulking."

I sat up and looked her in the eye. "He's coming back! He has to come back." She looked at me with sad eyes. I felt tears welling in my eyes but I held them back so she didn't see me cry. I didn't want her to see me cry, I wanted to be strong like I always had. She pulled me into her arms and held me close.

"Don't be afraid to cry, you don't have to be strong anymore." With those word a wall broke down and a flood of tears ran down my face.

"I miss him so much!" I balled.

"I know, I miss him too." She rubbed my back gently. We sat there for a very long time holding each other.

"OH MRS. LUCY, MR. HENRY, MS. ROSEY. COME QUICK, COME QUICK, COME COME." A maid yelled from the main hall, she sounded so frazzled. I looked at my mom then darted out of the room down the stairs. The maid was standing by the door with a smile on her face, like she always had.