You're A Mess, Tangled With Your Confidence

Homesick

I awoke to the alarm blaring. I moaned, opening my eyes and touched my forehead. I recalled Dirk touching me there and I wondered where he was. I rolled to my side and yawned sitting up and I felt oddly dazed. Not because I was tired but because something was wrong and I didn't know what. I was in my room. I desperately checked the time and I choked a bit. It was Monday. I blinked a few times but it wouldn't change. What was happening to me? I had to get ready for school. . Something was wrong. I couldn't remember anything. Where was Dirk? Why is it Monday all of a sudden? How did I end up home? I sat in my room in utter shock. I drug my hands down my face, hoping it was some sort of dream but to no avail. I numbly stood up and began pacing slowly around my room. Where did my memory go? On the inside I was screaming but on the outside I seemed calm and out of place. As if I were daydreaming. I heard my door creak and I turned to find a sleepy Jade. 

"Jake, the alarm's still going off." she said, walking past me and switching off the blaring thing. I hadn't even noticed. 

"Jade, how did I get home?" I asked as she rubbed the gunk out of her green eyes. 

"You came home yesterday, after the weekend at Dirk's. He dropped you off at home. Why?" she asked as she studied my features with her gleaming emerald eyes. I held my breath for a moment or two. 

"Jade. . .I can't remember. I can't remember Sunday. I can't remember how I got home. I can't remember what happened." I said, sitting next to her on my bed. I felt defeated. I was lost. I recalled my dream. . .

"Jake are you okay?. . .Are you sure you can't remember?" Jade asked as she gave me a worried look. I didn't want to make her worry.

"Not really Jade. . .I .. . I can't recall anything." I said honestly. Nothing in this situation felt right. I felt upset at myself. I was torn from my thoughts as she hugged me, and I instinctively ran my fingers through her hair. She's one of the few people who can calm me down. I remembered when we would go on adventures together. How I used to brush her hair. How she teased me. I remembered the fun games we would play on our island. How everything seemed normal. I hugged her back as a feeling of homesickness flooded me. 

"Jake I think it's best if you stay home today. . .I'll tell Grandpa." she said, earning a stiff nod from me. I released her from my arms and she quickly left the room. The warmth of the room seemed to have left with her. I shivered. I stayed in the same spot and blinked a few times. The room was quiet and I counted the amount of heartbeats that rang in my ears. After a few moments I layed back down, pulling the covers over my head. It gave me comfort as I realized how scared I actually was about losing my memory. How long would it last?. . .I didn't know. I felt alone. I then recalled a laugh and a familiar smile that I instantly recognized. I smiled a bit, remembering Dirk's face and how he never failed to make me happy. I wondered what he was doing now. I wondered if he could tell me what happened. A sudden thought went through my head and my smile faltered. Could he be the one who did this to me? . . .