What if?

14. I Love You?

        "Hey it's Luke! I can't get to my phone right now so leave a message after the beep!" I should've known he wouldn't pick up. *beep* "Hey Luke.. It's me. Um I just w-wanted to apologise for earlier. I-I didn't mean for you to hear what I said. I didn't know what to believe, because a celebrity like you don't usually fall for fans like me a-and it was all so confusing. I know I don't have an excuse for what I said. But you were just there at the wrong time and heard what I didn't want to tell you that night back at the hotel, I just.." I took a deep breath.

        "I guess I was scared.. I saw you on tv the other day, coming out of a club with Lara? I don't know what the real story is but it makes me scared okay? Scared to loose you.. But it's funny.. Because you were never even mine in the first place.. I don't expect you to forgive me but I just thought you should know that I-I'm really really sorry that I doubted you.. And I forgive you for any lie you've told me. I understand if you don't want to talk to me anymore so um.. I guess this is it then. I really treasured our time together and I'm sure I'll treasure it forever, thank you Luke.."

        I hesitated, but I said it. "... I love you.. Goodbye." I hung up, letting my tears pour out as I cried hugging Tilly the elephant. After 20 minutes of crying I just couldn't stand being cooped up in the hotel room anymore so I decided to go for a walk. Who cares if I get lost? I just need some fresh air.

        I got dressed and headed down to the lobby. My face was puffy and my eyes were swollen and red from the crying. I walked out of the hotel and just walked. I had no idea where I was going but I didn't care. The tears came back when I walked past a couple laughing about how they first met. Memories of my first encouter with Luke came floating back and I just broke.

        I realized that I was at the park I ran to earlier. I found a bench so I sat down and cried in my hands. After calming myself I looked up to see an old couple sitting right infront of me. I wondered if that would be Luke and I when we're old if this works out but I don't think it will. The image of how hurt he looked was planted in my head and it kills me. How could I have been so stupid? If only I had kept my thoughts to myself instead of getting someone else's opinion on it maybe this wouldn't have happenned. Ughhh.. I bet not meeting Luke at all would hurt less than this.

        Suddenly I was hit by a cold breeze instantly regretting not putting on my jacket before leaving the hotel so I stood up and started to wander back to the hotel. Hoping that I'm going the right way. I checked my phone to find out that it was about 10pm but noticed another stupid thing I did. It was not charging my phone. It was at 5% and I didn't want to waste it on googling up the way back to my hotel because I knew for sure that I was lost. It being this late, the streets were surprisingly still busy, full of cars going here and there. I wasn't used to the system here, it was way different from the system we have in America.

        I was infront of a nice cafe called Little One, when I gave in and decided to ask this lady who looked like she was in her 50's for directions to my hotel. She told me to cross the street and get a cab to take me because it was too far to walk. It was a 20 minutes car ride back. I didn't pay attention to how far the park was from the hotel earlier. I guess I was too consumed in my own thoughts to focus on the road. Which explains why I got lost in the first place. I thanked her before touching my pockets to find some cash, thank God.

        As I waited for the light to turn green so I could cross, I decided to check my phone. I couldn't help but wonder if Luke called me back to tell me that he forgives me, or if he hates me and doesn't say a word to me. Nothing. I decided to give Luke another call. He didn't pick up this time either so I guess I'm leaving another message.

        "Hey Luke. Me again. I don't know if you got my last voice message but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I-it was all just a misunderstanding.." I paused and I saw people rushing across the road so I crossed too as I finished the last bit of my voice message to Luke. "Also I just wanted to say that I-"

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What happenned? I know this doesn't match up with the last chapter but it will make sense soon. I hope lol I didn't really think this book through, I'm just writing and let it go with the flow but I hope you guys like it! Tweet me! @Gelyn_lyn :-) *p.s. this chapter was unpublished and republished due to some mistakes of my own*