Daddy Ash [ a.f.i ]

chapter twenty-five

Ashtons POV

it been three days since Michael called her phone and he hasn't stopped. She keeps telling me that she feels bad, but that she really loves me and doesn't want anyone or anything to cause us to fight.

I've been going to therapy sessions, I've learned different ways to keep myself from becoming very angry and hurting people.

"Mr.Irwin, would you like medication for your treatment or do you want to try techniques instead?"

"which do you suggest?"

"Considering your level of anger I would like to put you on the medication, but we always give you an option before giving them to you."

"I guess I'll take the pills." I say in a low yet soft tone.

"Alright.." he scribbles some things down on a piece of paper and hands it to me.

"Come back in a month and we will see if you had any improvements." he gives me a fake smile as I stand up, shake his hand, and leave.

I head off to the closest drug store and put in my prescription. After 20 minutes of looking at magazines, my medication is ready and I leave.

I go to my car, open the bottle, and take my medicine.

"Let's see how this goes.." I whisper to myself.

I drive to my house and go inside, greeting Luke and throwing my medicine on the kitchen counter.

Luke looks at the bag, confused yet interested to see what it is.

"What's that?"

"Meds."

"Why?"

"Therapist said I needed them, so there they are." I shrug and walk to my room. I lay down on my bed and call my princess.

"Hello?"

"Hi angel."

"Hi daddy."

"How are you?"

"Good, how did the appointment go?"

I sigh slightly over the phone and can sense her frowning in the other side.

"Well, he put me on medication to help my anger. I already took one pill and I don't feel much different."

"I'm sorry.. I wish there was some other way."

"I just feel really dead. like a zombie or something."

"Just give it time Ash, it'll wear off and the meds will end up helping you."

"I know."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"I have to go now, I'll call you later to check on you."

"okay babygirl."

"Bye."

"Bye."

With that I hung up, feeling numb. I don't like this feeling, at all. my head is in a different universe and my body is just here. I'm just a being at the moment.

I don't want to feel this way but if it makes her happy I'll stay like this. if it makes her feel safe I'll continue.

With those last thoughts I doze off in bed. Only to wake back up a few hours later.

I walk out to the kitchen and grab the bottle of medication. I read the side affects label to see what they are.

Insomnia.

Great, just what I need.

I go back to my bed and lay there, staring at the ceiling. I decide to call my kitten again.

"Daddy, it's 3 in the morning."

"I know kitten, but my medication is causing me to have insomnia and I don't know what to do."

"Okay..ill talk to you."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"When will I see my real kitten again."

"Maybe soon."

"I love having you as MY little girl. you're the most beautiful human I've ever laid my eyes on."

She falls silent, I figure she must have fallen asleep until I hear sniffles.

"That was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me, daddy."

"I love you baby girl."

"I love you too. so much."

"I'll let you sleep. I know you are tired, I can hear it in your voice." I say.

"I don't want to quit talking though."

"Then keep going."

"Ashton fletcher Irwin, I love you with all of my heart. You make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world, like I'm the only person on this earth. I'm so happy you chose me out of every other girl to be your kitten. I was against it for the longest but once you showed me what it's like to have a daddy, I didn't want anything or anyone else. All I've ever wanted is you and I see that now. I hurt you by choosing Michael and I never should have done that. He could never treat me the way I need to be treated. He could never be you."

I fall silent at her words, they hit my heart with mixtures of happiness and sadness.

"Ashton?" her innocent voice echoes through the phone.

"How is it that you can make me the happiest and saddest person ever?"

"I don't know baby." she whispers

"Me either, but I love it and I love you."

"You can go to bed now, if you'd like." I add in.

"Okay, will I see you tomorrow?" she asks

"Of course baby girl. if you'd like to then I'll be there."