They Don't Know About Us

Chapter 4- Confusion

Camila Pov

After the moment that me and Lauren shared in the back of the bus, we hadn't spoken since. I was afraid of this happening. The only times that we would talk would be the times that we were on stage singing and dancing. Every now and then I could feel those gorgeous emeralds burning into the back of my head while i'm singing, but it feels good to have her staring at me.

It makes me sad that sometimes feelings cannot be returned, especially when they are strong. I couldn't get my mind off of her ever. I always seemed to find myself staring at her. After one of the particular interviews, she confronted me backstage.

"Camila, what the hell was that back there?!" She said tugging on my arm as we were walking.

"What was what?" I asked, pretending to be oblivious about the whole thing.

"You, your nonstop fucking staring! Your practically begging for everyone to notice you!" Lauren shouted.

"Not my fault that you had to go and wear that!" I said motioning her outfit. She was wearing a tight black dress with black heels. The dress showed a lot of cleavage, to my disadvantage of course.

"Seriously? We aren't even dating Camila. And we couldn't even if we wanted to. So don't look at me like your in love with me." She said trying to walk away, but I stepped in front of her.

"You can't tell me who to love! And why should we let the rest of the world tell us who we can and can't love? We won't risk breaking the group apart because we would have all the support in the world. Do you really think that fans would just up and leave because we decided to finally share our feelings for eachother? If they want to leave then let them, they obviously don't know what being in love feels like. Because you know what Lauren? When I'm around you my heart speeds up and it feels like its going to break through my chest for you. The moment I saw you, all of the oxygen in my lungs got taken away. I wouldn't want to be with anyone else because if I was, I'd only have you on my mind the whole time. If I kissed someone else, I would rather be kissing you instead. If I was hugging someone else, I'd rather be hugging you instead. I fucking love you! And if I have to shout it in front of the whole fucking world then damn it I will! To prove how much I feel for you I will!"

She stared at me with a blank, unreadable expression. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed it again. Then, she just walked away. She fucking walked away. I didn't stop the tears from falling. They fell hard now. They stung at my eyes, pouring down in streaks on my cheeks. If she really wanted to play this game, I hope she knew who she was dealing with.

3 years later... (2015)

"Rumors of Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello are dating are making their way all over social media. Could this really be a couple?" A news reporter said on the subject of fifth harmony. Lauren snatched up the remote and shut off the TV.

"Lauren if your that angry about it then why don't you do something?" Normani asked. I had been watching and listening from the couch. They thought I couldn't hear because I had my headphones in, but I wasn't actually listening to music. Lauren always takes the oppertunity to talk about me when she thinks i'm not listening.

"Because! She's happy. Let her be happy." Lauren stated, folding her arms across her chest.

"You've got to be kidding. You think she's happy? She doesn't look at Shawn the way she looks at you. Do we have to pull up YouTube and search up camren videos. I can show you so much if you don't believe me." Normani said raising her eyebrows.

"The camera only captures what is there to see. It doesn't capture the peoples feelings within the shot." Lauren slumped down into the chair, tossing the remote on the table next to her.

"That was deep." Dinah said looking up from her phone.

"Better shut up before Mila hears you." Ally commented, nodding her head towards me.

I quickly flickered my gaze back down to my phone to avoid questions. I scrolled through Instagram, seeing the popular tag 'Shawmila' everywhere. It's funny how people think that we are together, when really we are just close friends. Shawn has tried to make moves on me, but I always push him away.

Why try and be with someone that you don't have feelings for? Why be with someone when you have feelings for another? That's like being trapped in a cage with a person, being forced to love them, while the person you really do love is trapped in a cell next to you, being forced to watch you love someone else. It hurts.

I got up from the couch and left to the back room. I couldn't get the door closed, because Lauren came barging in after me, shutting the door behind her.

"What the-"

"Shut up." She interrupted, crashing her lips into mine. The kiss didn't last long though, she ended with pulling my bottom lip from within her teeth and staring at me with eyes that ate me alive.

"What the hell?" I asked, stunned and breathless.

"I can't hold it back any longer. Yes Camz, I do love you. And you know what, for three years I had to hold that back. For three years I went through breakups because I hadn't wanted them, but wanted you. You were so close but so far away. You go on tours with me and hell you even sing solos with me. But yet you are so distant from me. I can't sit or stand next to you, compliment you, or even look at you without fans screaming about it on social media. I want to be with you but its so hard."

She poured her heart out. She had finally admitted feelings for me. After three years of a one-sided relationship filled with so many tears and unanswered questions, she had finally admitted feelings for me. How did I feel about this? How should I feel? What should I do? My brain racked with so many questions that only one person could answer. And she had been standing right in front of me.

"Lauren?" I asked biting my lip.

"Yeah?" She replied a bit uneasy.

"Can we finally make this something, but behind the cameras?" Hope was bursting inside now.

"Yes."