I Love Him But I Can't (Scallison)

Quality Time

I got home and I started my homework. Lydia popped into my mind though. I felt so guilty. I didn't do anything but I felt guilty for liking Scott. No one could blame me. He's practically perfect besides his crooked jawline but I found it cute. His six pack that glistened during practice. No, stop. I can't be thinking about Lydia's boyfriend like that. She's been so nice to me and she doesn't even know me. I can't have feelings for her boyfriend. He and I can be friends but that's it. It's not like it could go any further than that anyway.

"Allison," my mom shouted from downstairs. "Dinner's ready."

"Coming mom," I shouted back. I turn to face my mirror. "You have to stop thinking about Scott."

I jogged down the stairs after that. My dad sat to my left and my mom was to my right.

"So, how was school," my mom asked sweetly.

"Fine. I made a new friend."

Dad smiles and says "Who is it?"

"Lydia Martin. She's really sweet and amazingly smart."

Dad smiles and says "I'm glad. So you like it here?"

"Yeah. We'll be staying how long this time? A month? Two months? Three?"

My mom smiles and says "Actually, we'll be staying permanently."

"Really? You're not joking right?"

Dad puts his hand over mine and says "No we're not joking. We'll be staying here permanently."

I jump up and say "Thank you guys so much. So I can actually unpack all my boxes? I don't have to leave some stuff inside just in case?"

"Unpack every last thing and put it where you want because we're staying here for a long, long time."

"Thank you so much."

/

The next day at school, I felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I didn't feel guilty anymore. I could control my emotions. It's not like I'm gonna have to spend time alone with him anytime soon. I was grabbing books from my locker when Lydia came over.

"You have to hangout with Scott. You two need to get to know each other better." She claps her hands together happily. "So I set up for you two to be Chemistry partners."

My books fell out of my hands. "You, you swapped my partner?"

"Yes!" She smiled. "My best friend and my boyfriend have to get along. So by forcing you two to be Chemistry partners, you'll spend more time together. So I'll be with your partner now and you'll be with Scott."

"I don't know Lydia. Maybe you and I should be partners instead. Then we can hangout the three of us when we don't have assignments."

"Hanging out the three of us won't give you two the proper opportunity to get to know each other better."

This would not end well. This could not end well. Nothing good could come from this. She was pushing me to spend time with him. She wants me to work with her boyfriend. Her amazingly sweet boyfriend. Her extremely hot boyfriend. Her very muscular boyfriend.

"Lydia, I don't really feel comfortable with that. Some of the assignments are take home, which would mean him coming to my house at night."

Lydia laughs and says "I know that. What better way to get to know each other than at night while doing homework? You can chat while answering the questions." She raises an eyebrow at me and I guess my face looks worried. I'm still so shocked that I don't even remember the last facial expression I used. "Do you turn into an assassin when the sun goes down or something because you seem really worried."

"No, it's just, he's your boyfriend."

Lydia nods and says "I know that." She let out a little chuckle. "I'm telling you to work on Chemistry projects with him and labs. I'm not asking you to marry him before lunch."

"I just don't feel comfortable with it. Swap back."

"Can't." She said with a frown. "Mr. Harris posted the new partner groups in the main hallway and everyone signed off on the changes but you."

That's just great. Now Scott's my partner because everyone in the class gave their consent to the pairings. Wait a minute. Everyone? Including Scott?

"How does Scott feel about this?"

"He's fine with it. He was one of the first handful of people to sign off on the partnerships. He said he looked forward to it."

He's looking forward to working with me? Really? I couldn't help the small smile that appeared on my face.

"I'll try it out for a little while, but we swap back if it continues to be somewhat awkward between us."

Lydia jumps up and hugs me quickly. "Thank you. Thank you."

We walked to Chemistry and instead of going to my seat from yesterday, I took the one to the left of Scott.

"Hey Allison," he said with a blinding smile. "So did Lydia tell you about Saturday yet?"

"What's Saturday?"

"The first lacrosse game. She said she was gonna invite you to sit with her. Something about showing you the ropes."

I lean back in my seat and look to Lydia who was talking to Stiles. "Lydia, you never told me about Saturday."

"I sent you a text last night. You never got back to me." She pulls out her phone and shows me the message. "I assumed you'd just answer me at lunch. I should've guessed that you didn't reply because you didn't get it."

"It's fine. I'll be there."

"You will?"

"Yeah. I'll keep you company and we can talk."

Scott smiles and says "Lyds, pizza after the game?"

"Pizza sounds great," she said. "But you should go with Allison instead. Get to know each other."

Scott shrugs and turns to me with the most adorable sheepish smile. "Pizza?"

No. I can't go. I can't get pizza with him. Just tell him you have a family thing afterwards. Tell him your allergic to pizza. He smiles wider and all those thoughts disappear.

"I'd love to."

"Great. I'll need your number."

I then say "Just, put in your number and I'll call you."

Scott did it quickly and transfers the phone back to me. He was looking into my eyes and I couldn't look away from them. They were mesmerizing.

Mr. Harris then says "Alright class. Let's begin so we can pretend I taught you something and as can leave."

That broke my eye contact with Scott and the guilt came back. It was crushing me. I felt like I actually had a weight on my shoulder. Scott puts his hand on my shoulder with a worried expression. All the pain went away then.

"Are you ok?"

"Never better," before giving him a quick small smile.

Lydia looks over at us and she gives me a thumbs up. The guilt didn't come though because he still had his hand on my shoulder. He was still looking at me with worry. I could have a crush on him. Half the grade probably does. I just can't act on it because it'll hurt Lydia. I can control myself around him. I hope.